People & animals
Everyone named in the columns: family, friends, neighbours, gardeners, trichologists and the occasional Minister of Defence. Click a name to find every column that mentions them.
Bar height is how many names sit under each letter. Most named of all is Jamie, 456 times.
People
Abe Berry 1× in 1 column
Cartoonist, named among the talents she says made us laugh.
Abigail Kubheka 1× in 1 column
Singer, named in the same Cape Town concert line-up.
Adam Leslie 1× in 1 column
Theatrical satirist of the 1960s who, she writes, used wit to emphasise the ridiculous.
Adam Rosendorf 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Adelmarie Bekker 5× in 1 column
Launched the Universal Bond Party in Johannesburg, and so gave Carol the idea.
Agatha Crump 28× in 15 columns
Book club member who mislaid a son behind his hair.
Is later life just, well, a set of spare parts?·Who's hanging up on life?·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Uteri for hire·Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·Is man really necessary?·Clothes to rend the family apart·Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·Now it's see and tell·Down Under wives pant for pay; here it’s zilch·Get away from it all with a 7-year hitch·Joining the club in university of life·Bring on the sleep machine!·Democracy is a fragile plant·Turning red after being in the pink
Agnes Crump 4× in 3 columns
Book club member with false teeth and a walking stick. Printed thus in 1989; elsewhere the name is Agatha Crump.
Old age or not, 10 eggs per meal is murder·Mental quarks about carrots·Let’s dress men up for a long life
Agnes Grooble 1× in 1 column
Another of the Agneses of the northern suburbs.
Agnes Hotch 1× in 1 column
Of the knitting club. Thought it absolutely wonderful.
Agnes Sogwick 1× in 1 column
Mother seen fetching Warwick in Come the revolution.
Agnes String 1× in 1 column
At the coffee klatsch. How lucky can you get.
Agnes Thwatch 3× in 1 column
"Did you hear about Agnes Thwatch?" asked Betty, and the town was buzzing.
Agnes Tuttle 4× in 2 columns
Northern suburbs friend and trendsetter. Dyed her hair green when auburn was fashionable, and got the cooked-roast-beef status symbol first.
So who needs a status symbol in their life? Me·So who’s busy?
Al Debbo 1× in 1 column
South African actor and comedian. A mother thought the Lazar son looked more like him than like Robert Redford.
Alain 2× in 1 column
The friend who phoned from France about Ralph and Fatima.
Alan Jones 1× in 1 column
World champion of 1980, who does not run out of petrol because someone took the money for tuck shop.
Alan Singer 2× in 1 column
Technical field services manager discussing tyres at the General Tyres event.
Alex 2× in 2 columns
Another child whose toothmouse paid better than Nicky's.
The toothmouse strikes again·Old age or not, 10 eggs per meal is murder
Alex Hennige 2× in 1 column
Of Namibia. Sued over an aged Austrian rhino.
Alexander Bell 4× in 2 columns
Blame it all on him, she writes: the frustration, the incessant noise.
Blame it on Mr Bell·Oh ring where is thy ding a ling a ling?
Alexia 6× in 3 columns
One of the four friends on the holiday, with Volker, Wim and Graham.
Hark, the Jewish angel sings·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen·My daughter the fish
Alicia Markova 1× in 1 column
Named by a neighbour boasting that she has two of them at home.
Alma Tuttle 2× in 1 column
Trade union leader of the mothers, and once Miss Peach Complexion. Worn out at 43.
Amanda 11× in 2 columns
Another of the picnic's casualties.
In the bush with the terrors·Who is this amazing cook and whiz with the vacuum?
Amelia Klongthorpe 3× in 1 column
Bought the shaggy-bear lined basket, and lost the argument about the bed.
Amos 2× in 1 column
Builder, recommended by a friend of a friend, who fell through the roof with his ladder and stayed on as the resident builder.
Anastasia Villioti not yet in the archive
Spero's mother. At the table and gloriously attired.
Andrea 1× in 1 column
Tish's daughter, whose matric was being whispered about.
Andrew Ian 2× in 2 columns
The name Nicky went by in utero.
The day my daughter turned into a swan·Heaven is ... a heedful dog
Andries Treurnicht 2× in 2 columns
Conservative Party leader; invoked by a husband who thought taking a dog to be classified was overdoing it.
Burning rubber in the bushes·So who needs a hog and a hyena in their lives?
Andy 1× in 1 column5 drawings
Cartoonist. Signed the drawings that ran with the column in The Sunday Star in 1987, the one name and no more. Named years later among the formidable talents who made us laugh.
Angel Gabriel 4× in 3 columns
What he wore the silk sheets as, in a concert.
The silk sheet syndrome·Motherhood — it’s a great big crying rip-off·The rise and fall of a Jewish Santa
Angela 3× in 2 columns
Observed that if you lose your husband and advertise, perhaps you will find a look-alike.
Angela Villioti not yet in the archive
Spero's sister, in a ball gown he designed, fitted and made that morning.
Anita Snodwick 6× in 1 column
Jumped out of a bedroom window rather than cover another exercise book. Her son is Herbie.
Mothers of the world unite for you have only brown paper to lose
Anna Cox 7× in 1 column
Fellow journalist. They teamed up to test tyres.
Anneline Kriel Kerzner 13× in 5 columns
Miss World 1974, South African; a benchmark of social status.
A little bit of status gets you nowhere·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·My private insights into Winnie and Anneline
Anuschka 1× in 1 column
Great-great-grandmother, whose Siberian crystal came out for the ultimate civilised breakfast.
Aristotle Onassis 5× in 5 columns
The shipowner, invoked for the only kind of yacht not built for midgets.
Flush your worries away — ask the kids·Eat your heart out Jackie O·Bite the dust baby, cos here I come·It's a perfectly opposite life·Life is just a bar of wormy chocolate
Arnie Benjamin 1× in 1 column
Columnist, named among the writers whose wit she reads for pleasure.
Arnold Schwarzenegger 3× in 3 columns
The shape a builder takes at dawn, and the only person a husband expects his wife to run away with.
Scuba divers do it deeper·I'm the Queen of the crumbling castle·Congrats, for thousands of us, might be in order
Arth 45× in 16 columns
One-legged partner at the dancing studio. Lost a leg in Bronkhorstspruit, left another in the washroom of the Cape Town train, and lost a third across the studio floor.
Sad lament of a dried-out drudge·And a happy Christmas to you too·Everyone loves a swinger·Well, hello Mother Christmas!·Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·Mystery and intrigue on the Drakensberg Express·Oozing oil from every pore·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Guru Spock moves over...·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·Cutting down trees isn't the only way to calm down·If only the ghost of old Hog would rise up and bite·Guns & Mobile Phones·Leather, latex and lingerie ripe for the plucking·Politically correct language·A little perfection can go a long way
Arthur 40× in 16 columns
Estelle's husband, a little solid, who cheated at cards and ran away with a 21-year-old belly dancer.
Sad lament of a dried-out drudge·And a happy Christmas to you too·Everyone loves a swinger·Well, hello Mother Christmas!·Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·Mystery and intrigue on the Drakensberg Express·Oozing oil from every pore·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Guru Spock moves over...·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·Cutting down trees isn't the only way to calm down·If only the ghost of old Hog would rise up and bite·Guns & Mobile Phones·Leather, latex and lingerie ripe for the plucking·Politically correct language·A little perfection can go a long way
Arthur Chambers 5× in 1 column
Aromatherapist whom Carol visited for a massage.
Arthur Markowitz 7× in 1 column
Dog trainer at Zoo Lake and author of "This Is Your Dog". Succeeded Dr Spock as the guru at the side of the bed.
Attila the Hun 4× in 4 columns
What a 14-year-old looks like striding up and down a shoe shop in white ethnic clodhoppers.
They call it high-flying living·Exams are hell on the cells·Help! I've got a teenage daughter·More info on world’s first flush toilet
Aunt Ethel 2× in 1 column
Her silver tea set, sold to pay for the Seychelles, had seen better days and fetched half the asking price.
Aunt Fanny 4× in 1 column
The husband's late aunt, who left him the fan heater that melted the fuse box, a bear skin rug with a missing eye and a chamber pot without a handle.
Auntie Bertha 1× in 1 column
Sang "Happy Birthday" down the line from New York at 10pm, six months early. "That's right Carol, I never forget."
Barbara 5× in 2 columns
"Hello, this is Barbara. Is Barry there?"
Barbara Woodhouse 1× in 1 column
Dog trainer, gripping on television while the biltong was being wished for.
Barbra Streisand 4× in 4 columns
Invoked by Carol's husband on seeing his son in a skirt. The clipping spells her Barbara.
Revolution of the fig leaf generation·The diningroom table’s the backbone of the family: Help! We’ve just collapsed·Needed now — inflatable mum for deflated dad·Clothes to rend the family apart
Barnett Rosenberg 1× in 1 column
American biophysicist. Held that two degrees cooler buys you to 120.
Barry 240× in 99 columns
Son. The 17-year-old status oracle.
The toothmouse strikes again·Oh death where is thy sting?·Flush your worries away — ask the kids·Braais — or who burned the wors?·Property tycoon trauma·Cast off the gherkins·A louse in time saves nine·Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Who hates Gertrude Ginkel?·Who said Valentines were soppy?·Life is just a tube of toothpaste·Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·In the swim of things·The sad demise of Horace·Uncle Walter in long-Johns·So who said parties are such fun?·Happy Father's Day to you·A little flu goes a long way·Sad lament of a dried-out drudge·When spare parts hardly happen·Tall, dark and handsome·In the bush with the terrors·Culture vulture·So who invented New Year?·Who invented the fork anyway?·Blame it on Mr Bell·There's a blight in my bath·Well, hello Mother Christmas!·1982 — the year of the mole cricket·Cast off your school uniforms·So who wants to be a fish?·When a scone means failure or success·Revolution of the fig leaf generation·Roll out the pastry, your country needs you.·Mammoth mother strikes again·A book, a bough, a glass of wine and that’s it·A little bit of status gets you nowhere·Things aren’t what they used to be – or what they should be for that matter·When death is a welcome release·Watchit! Here comes Niki Lauda Lazar!·There’s nothing quite like drowning to keep you fit·So who needs to speak English these days?·When parents and teachers meet — life’s always exciting·Drink champagne and do your bit for South Africa·The diningroom table’s the backbone of the family: Help! We’ve just collapsed·Needed now — inflatable mum for deflated dad·Hey! Watchit Greek islands — here comes Momma Lazar!·Never give up in a tight spot·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·Every mother has a cross to — bear some are heavier than others·Gerrie for Prime Minister·Help! help! I’m a prisoner in a body·Help, help, there’s a hell’s angel trying to get out·Motherhood — it’s a great big crying rip-off·Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen·A fishy tale with a bite·So who needs romance on St Valentine's Day?·A little drama in life goes a long way·Every mother should have her day·Anyone for a culture shock?·Who said running is fun?·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·Never mind the lumps in the jam — it’s the thought that counts·Meet my son the rock star·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·Who's hanging up on life?·Who's having a ball?·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away·Men's lib could start with a little chiffon·It could probably happen to anyone·Full marks for matric tact and tactics·On the slippery slope to fame·Braving the depths of life in a wetsuit·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·Birthday greetings ‘Kos’ a fortune·Some fishy tales of feminine prowess·I'm not hogging it over the jet set·The rise and fall of a Jewish Santa·Raisins are tasty, but children are more filling·Sons, daughters, decisions and dual standards·Fattening and flexing in the great flab war·Snappy hint for canine canines·Thermal pants his bottom line·It’s not junk, it’s our history·So, what's a lion or two?·Matric blues and a new era·Some dags cakked under the strine·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·Why didn’t I do this all before?·Oh boy, mom remembered the blatjang·To sleep perchance to dream·There are absolutely no flies on the Elixir of Life·Husband or jacuzzi? Is there a real choice?·Cricket, mealies and joy of being mother-in-law-to-be·'African Renaissance' is nonsense until killing ends·Maya is Born·Well hello, Maya, it's nice to know you're here at last
Barry Ronge 3× in 2 columns
Compere of the ball. "Ah, it's Rent a Ronge," muttered someone as the lights went down.
Who's having a ball?·'African Renaissance' is nonsense until killing ends
Baryshnikov 4× in 1 column
Mikhail Baryshnikov, the dancer. A local one was to sweep her off to Tahiti.
Bea Reid 2× in 1 column
In the specification for the inflatable mum: cooks like Clement Freud, speaks like Bea Reid, sings like Barbra Streisand.
Beau Brummel 2× in 2 columns
Regency dandy, offered as an alternative public speaker.
Beethoven 5× in 5 columns
His Fifth, the only thing in the room louder than a dieting husband's stomach.
Oh death where is thy sting?·So who said fat was fun?·If music be the food of love . . . starve·Every mother should have her day·Fattening and flexing in the great flab war
Ben Patterton 1× in 1 column
Fellow judge at the Sandton SPCA Mutt of the Year Show.
Bert 2× in 1 column
A Dutchman by birth and direct with it. Spends his spare time recruiting blood donors, and talked her into a clinic bed on a Wednesday afternoon.
Bertha Bones 1× in 1 column
Militant mother of seven sons, and spiritual mentor in the campaign against school uniform.
Bertha Ginkel 10× in 10 columns
Book club member. Lost a pair of culottes to a hamburger with chili relish.
Is man really necessary?·Clothes to rend the family apart·Now it's see and tell·Down Under wives pant for pay; here it’s zilch·Old age or not, 10 eggs per meal is murder·Get away from it all with a 7-year hitch·Joining the club in university of life·Bring on the sleep machine!·Mental quarks about carrots·Let’s dress men up for a long life
Bertha Ginkle 2× in 2 columns
Comments on the proposed desert-island holiday.
Momma is marooned on an island paradise·Turning red after being in the pink
Bertha Hogg 3× in 1 column
Book club member. Called uterus rental immoral, then came round to the positive aspects of the formation of such a company.
Beth 1× in 1 column
Friend of the well-rounded figure, who holds that all a diet needs is willpower, and takes a second slice of almond tart while saying so.
Betty 176× in 106 columns
The good friend telephoned in every crisis; always reassuring and always wrong.
Property tycoon trauma·The bean trail rides again·What a life ... it shouldn't happen to anyone·Blame it on Mr Bell·Be happy you're born a woman·Every father deserves his day·The silk sheet syndrome·When a scone means failure or success·Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·Mammoth mother strikes again·Sex is here to stay·Stimulate your sole·Hey, look! It’s big Les and little Carol on the mean machine·Hark, the Jewish angel sings·When death is a welcome release·So who did what to whom in Plet?·A smoky tale of woe·The banana loaf mother strikes back·Hey! Watchit Greek islands — here comes Momma Lazar!·Flying high in hospital·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·Henry the hog falls in love·Life’s just an old spark plug anyway ...·Every mother needs a book club·When jogging goes to Carol’s head·Raindrops keep falling on my head·To hunt a man you need a drip-dry wig·Anyone for a culture shock?·A little home cooking to soup-up Zola·If you haven’t stuffed cannelloni ... you really haven’t lived·Happiness is when your son has a date for the matric dance·Momma is marooned on an island paradise·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·Never mind the lumps in the jam — it’s the thought that counts·The night sweet romance passed me by·Come the revolution·Exams are hell on the cells·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·We're all going on a cosy holiday·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Uteri for hire·Who's having a ball?·Boerewors is the bane of my life·If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away·Men's lib could start with a little chiffon·Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·So who needs a hog and a hyena in their lives?·Is man really necessary?·Guru Spock moves over...·Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·Full marks for matric tact and tactics·On the slippery slope to fame·Now it's see and tell·A versatile bowl fits two fish sandwiches·Down Under wives pant for pay; here it’s zilch·Say a swift Howzit! on your teledivellicater·Old age or not, 10 eggs per meal is murder·Smiles grow stiff amidst all the goodwill·Stubby’s farewell a pulverised garden·Die rubriek is ook in Afrikaans beskikbaar ...·Flushed with success in toiletry trade·Get away from it all with a 7-year hitch·Sons, daughters, decisions and dual standards·Bring on the sleep machine!·Who says it’s just a game?·Total onslaught all over again·On a countdown to fall-out·Parenthood’s prosaic myths·Democracy is a fragile plant·Mental quarks about carrots·Matric blues and a new era·Let’s dress men up for a long life·No coffee perks in my direction·Beware my little fender bender·Adverts' slogans power up our New South Africa·The sweet smell of sexcess·Our temple takes a tumble·Beating the gym-workout syndrome·How I nearly had my body unblocked·Oh boy, mom remembered the blatjang·Cold feet search nightly for a pair of warm thighs·Slicing bread is not as easy as it looks·Turning red after being in the pink·Exhaustedly talking my way into the New SA·There are absolutely no flies on the Elixir of Life·When a syringa twig does the job better, use it...·Laying the foundations for loving thy neighbour·Reversing the fate of a southern right whale·CD-Roms way beyond the ken of anyone over 4·Army surplus store proved to be accommodating·Vinning is vot counts, and our Boks did so in style·Cricket, mealies and joy of being mother-in-law-to-be·Don't camp if you're a wet, it's only for the foolhardy·Hotstuff Lazar cc will take a wait off your mind·Packing with a spouse not a bonding experience ...·New Year's Eve·107 black olives growing on a tree I planted myself·A dose of reverse-Viagra might go down well·When you croodle, you’ve moved beyond cuddling·Not out of my tree, just the opposite·Holed up in my underground shelter·Where, oh where have all the Beetles gone?·Chef in the making – and what a pain·My remote cellphone is confusing me·Where do missing hubcaps go?·Josias the kraal manure spreader knows his toes
Beverly Wakem 5× in 1 column
Director-general of the New Zealand Broadcasting Corporation, who banned 151 sexist words from the air and was toasted in retsina at the bookclub.
Big Dwayne Rockerfeller Junior 1× in 1 column
Answered a crossed line from Phoenix, Arizona, when Carol dialled Bloemfontein.
Bill Cosby 2× in 1 column
The Cosby Show held the family's attention while Carol was shut in the lavatory with a Parktown prawn.
Bill Haley 2× in 2 columns
Booked to sing Roman rock at a 13-year-old's orgy.
So who said parties are such fun?·If music be the food of love . . . starve
Bjorn Borg 2× in 1 column
The tennis player Herschel is going to beat.
Bo Derek 2× in 2 columns
What every middle-aged drudge should be made to feel like.
Bob Connolly 1× in 1 column
Cartoonist, named in the same line as Abe Berry and Richard Smith.
Bob Marley 1× in 1 column
Blasting Jamie awake at 6am every morning, until he was not.
Boris 27× in 11 columns
A delivery man of dry foodstuffs who moonlighted as a clairvoyant. "Psychically speaking, chaos is nigh."
Momma is marooned on an island paradise·Boris was Hugo looking for love·Touts at robots help usher in new SA·Maltese poodles are intrepid South African settlers·Gearing up for my son's Caribbean splicing not easy·There's a great new way of meeting people in SA·It's so easy to adapt to life in an island paradise·Ma needs her car in a hurry down here on Earth·Forgive my yawn as the cliché-crunchers take over·When you croodle, you’ve moved beyond cuddling·Holed up in my underground shelter
Boruch 2× in 2 columns
Her grandmother's brother, reputedly 103 when he died, and among the old and wise Shulmans at Stellenbosch.
The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style·What every good wife should know - or how to have a happy marriage
Brad Fisher 1× in 1 column
Brad from somewhere else, who with Johnny from Kimberley had formed a company.
Brian Barker 4× in 2 columns
Rosebank School caller reporting the children’s sporting mishaps.
A little drama in life goes a long way·Raisins are tasty, but children are more filling
Brigette Bardot 1× in 1 column
Spelt this way in the column.
Every mother has a cross to — bear some are heavier than others
Bruce Fordyce 3× in 3 columns
Comrades Marathon winner, and the standard a lawnmower is held to when it finally starts.
If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away·There's a mini-millionaire in our backyard·Is this a secret weapon, or what?
Bruce People 1× in 1 column
Of Overactive Promotions, on the telephone about the invitation.
Bruce Springsteen 2× in 2 columns
Played at the civilised breakfast in place of a live jazz quartette, and shocked the family awake.
When a country hick takes on the USA·The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style
Bruegel 1× in 1 column
Painter; invoked to describe chaos at Zoo Lake.
Carmel 1× in 1 column
Married a millionaire who whipped her away for holidays in the Caribbean. One of the ice-cream cone syndrome's counter-examples.
Carol Lazar 181× in 99 columns
The columnist.
Who said Valentines were soppy?·Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·So who said parties are such fun?·Gone fishin' ... or something·Sad lament of a dried-out drudge·In the bush with the terrors·Who invented the fork anyway?·What a life ... it shouldn't happen to anyone·Blame it on Mr Bell·So who needs a dreamhouse?·Well, hello Mother Christmas!·When a scone means failure or success·So who's got time to live these days?·A toothy tale about headgear·Who says it's a dog's life?·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·They say crocs lurk in the waters of the swamps·Sex is here to stay·A skeleton out of the cupboard·A book, a bough, a glass of wine and that’s it·So who’s busy?·Is later life just, well, a set of spare parts?·Stimulate your sole·Hey, look! It’s big Les and little Carol on the mean machine·Hark, the Jewish angel sings·Christmas comes but once a year – thank heavens·C’mon – it’s nearly Christmas, let’s have another swinging party·Things aren’t what they used to be – or what they should be for that matter·When parents and teachers meet — life’s always exciting·Mystery and intrigue on the Drakensberg Express·The banana loaf mother strikes back·Hey! Watchit Greek islands — here comes Momma Lazar!·Never give up in a tight spot·C’mon, plug into a whole new way of life·Henry the hog falls in love·I guess other mothers have trees too ...·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria·They call it high-flying living·Every mother needs a book club·The Great Trek strikes again·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen·Scuba divers do it deeper·When jogging goes to Carol’s head·Who said life was just one big hoot?·All about camels, cogs and turkeys and other things·Raindrops keep falling on my head·A little drama in life goes a long way·A murderer or saint?·So who needs Disney World when we’ve got the Rand Show?·King Alfred never made a mountain out of a cupcake·To hunt a man you need a drip-dry wig·How not to get into a stew·Anyone for a culture shock?·When Carol goes into battle dressed to kill·Who said running is fun?·Every mutt has its day·Momma is marooned on an island paradise·Oh ring where is thy ding a ling a ling?·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·Poor Dubowitz bites the dust·Heppy Klissimus to you, too·When life is just a bowl of kumquats·Meet my son the rock star·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·Who's hanging up on life?·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·There's a mini-millionaire in our backyard·The day I received advice from above·What every good wife should know - or how to have a happy marriage·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·A versatile bowl fits two fish sandwiches·It’s hard to live a little if you can’t let go a little·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·The day the grapevine broke down·Love’s but the frailty of mind·Turning red after being in the pink·Clutch gets into high gear·Touts at robots help usher in new SA·Queen of the World mourned, even on Cape Flats·CD-Roms way beyond the ken of anyone over 4·Husband or jacuzzi? Is there a real choice?·Army surplus store proved to be accommodating·Vinning is vot counts, and our Boks did so in style·Leather, latex and lingerie ripe for the plucking·Rambo Carol flexes muscles and vanquishes her foes·Sea creature now sports a funky pair of spectacles·Camping out for an ID and passing for ‘coloured’·I lost my men in a techno nightmare in cyberspace·Take Norman, my car·My ‘ubuntu braai’ idea sadly went down in flames·Nisson Mandra·Politically correct language·Buying a one way ticket to my dreams·Good times, bad times in a heartbeat·No longer making a spectacle of myself·I miss our fluffy little scrap of energy·Animal behaviour consultant
Carola 3× in 1 column
What she was called by a woman of at least 78.
What every good wife should know - or how to have a happy marriage
Casanova Zulman 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Cassius Clay 1× in 1 column
In the roll of boxers, with Rocky Marciano and Joe Louis.
Chantal 5× in 2 columns
From Paris, one of the French connection in the bush.
Beauty takes to the bush·My private insights into Winnie and Anneline
Charles Bronson 1× in 1 column
Named in the list of who you get at the movies.
Charles I 1× in 1 column
Beheaded in 1649, and, on Ms Bekker's evidence, the head on the bank notes.
Charlie Brown 1× in 1 column
Of peanuts fame, whose fashion in losing hearts she compares to.
Charlie Chaplin 3× in 2 columns
Fathered his last child at 72.
The Wedding causes civil war·Old age or not, 10 eggs per meal is murder
Charlotte Cocklethwaite 12× in 1 column
Friend, married three weeks, whose honeymoon went wrong in every possible way and who was saving herself for her wedding night.
Charmain Gale 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Chris 12× in 11 columns
One of the boys wanting a lift home in the same line.
So who said parties are such fun?·Fasten your helmets and your false teeth·Facing up to the bare facts of rhythm in the old genes·Up, up and away in a plastic bubble·Happiness is when your son has a date for the matric dance·Clothes to rend the family apart·Stubby’s farewell a pulverised garden·It’s hard to live a little if you can’t let go a little·Planet America is a wonder to behold·Listen up Mallett! My old mom has some ideas·Forget alien plants, what about guns?
Chris Barnard 4× in 4 columns
Named as a stretcher bearer in the comic roll call of a neighbourhood army.
Fasten your helmets and your false teeth·Facing up to the bare facts of rhythm in the old genes·Stubby’s farewell a pulverised garden·Listen up Mallett! My old mom has some ideas
Chris Levine 3× in 3 columns
Whose culottes her son borrowed to wear to a party.
Up, up and away in a plastic bubble·Happiness is when your son has a date for the matric dance·Clothes to rend the family apart
Christiane Noetzlin 1× in 1 column
Co-author of Le Baiser, the book about kissing discussed in the column.
Christopher Hope 1× in 1 column
South African novelist. Dashed through at the book club in three minutes flat.
Cindy 2× in 2 columns
Who needed information for a project, which is why Marion went to Turkey.
Mammoth mother strikes again·Hooray, it's happy holidays again
Clare Reidy 4× in 1 column
School friend whose bean was retarded in a pale and wan way, and who ended up with Nicky's.
Claude 5× in 4 columns
Named with Bertram in the same apology.
Oh death where is thy sting?·So who’s busy?·My daughter the fish·Husband or jacuzzi? Is there a real choice?
Clement Freud 2× in 2 columns
Named in the same specification.
Needed now — inflatable mum for deflated dad·No coffee perks in my direction
Cliff Saunders 5× in 3 columns
Broadcaster.
Groovy movie·Memories are made of evenings like this·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot
Clint Eastwood 1× in 1 column
What she sees in a man with a gun, another Clint Eastwood.
Clive Rice 1× in 1 column
Cricketer. Carol imagined being locked in a cricket-bat closet with him.
Clive Weil 1× in 1 column
Carol's favourite man, of the many TV appearances and the yellow-walled, silver-trollied background.
Clothilde 6× in 2 columns
A child in the same round of party invitations.
So who said parties are such fun?·It's so easy to adapt to life in an island paradise
Colin 3× in 2 columns
The crocodile enthusiast who offered a midnight trip into the Okavango swamps, and caught one.
They say crocs lurk in the waters of the swamps·Snappy hint for canine canines
Colleen Broadley 2× in 1 column
Fellow judge at the Sandton SPCA Mutt of the Year Show.
Constable Kapp 3× in 1 column
Parkview police officer who reports the fate of the stolen car Dubowitz.
Corrie Swanepoel 1× in 1 column
Traffic officer who joined the helicopter traffic-report flight.
Craig 6× in 3 columns
On holiday with Darryl and nine gerbils.
Hey, look! It’s big Les and little Carol on the mean machine·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen·Ag shame for a world which is oh so deprived
Craig Daniel 1× in 1 column
Organised Republic Day for South African expatriates in England.
Cyril 20× in 4 columns
Hairdresser, of France, late of Witbank and before that Pofadder; four and a half hours, and black hair came out the colour of dirty rust.
Sad lament of a dried-out drudge·When hair should never happen·Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·Yes, mom, God should have been a woman
Cyril Ramaphosa 1× in 1 column
Named in the referendum queue as a candidate, "better looking."
Damon 2× in 2 columns
Another child whose toothmouse paid better than Nicky's.
The toothmouse strikes again·Vinning is vot counts, and our Boks did so in style
Dan 4× in 3 columns
An incredible mathematician, in the roll of other people's gifted children.
Where have all the dumb kids gone?·So who said parties are such fun?·In the bush with the terrors
Daniele Pascal 2× in 1 column
Chanteuse. Did "Piaf in Cabaret" at the ball, and perked the husband up considerably.
Dante 1× in 1 column
Invoked to describe the same chaos rather less charitably.
Daphne Topping 1× in 1 column
A ballet mother down the road with the same problems.
Dave Gaskill 1× in 1 column157 drawings
Illustrator. Signed the drawings that ran with the Sunday Express columns from 1979 to 1982. One week no drawing came, and the column ended with a postscript saying he had not had time.
David 33× in 23 columns
Another child whose toothmouse paid better than Nicky's.
The toothmouse strikes again·Sardines in the sand·Groovy movie·Who invented the fork anyway?·Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·Mammoth mother strikes again·So who needs to speak English these days?·The banana loaf mother strikes back·When jogging goes to Carol’s head·Anyone for a culture shock?·Who said running is fun?·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·Raisins are tasty, but children are more filling·I’m loo-sing out on the new SA·Who says it’s just a game?·Matric blues and a new era·Beware my little fender bender·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·There are absolutely no flies on the Elixir of Life·For better or worse? That's the (cellphone) question
David Black 2× in 1 column
Brilliant gymnast and expert on reconditioning bodies. Wrote the schedule, could not supervise it, being in exams.
If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away
David Dembo 3× in 2 columns
Friend of Barry's. The long blonde asleep in Barry's bed, and the young man who could not be recognised with his clothes on. Still around nine years later, and by then calling her the old lady.
Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·There are absolutely no flies on the Elixir of Life
David Jammie 1× in 1 column
Came to the dinner of twenty in a hat.
David Rajak 1× in 1 column
Whose mumpy cheeks cleared quite nicely over the holiday.
David Robbins 1× in 1 column
South African writer. Dashed through at the book club in three minutes flat.
David Vermeulen 3× in 1 column
On the other end of the phone, and briefly mistaken for God.
Deon Mostert 1× in 1 column
Named over what she calls a fiasco, and asks whether it was a diversionary tactic.
Desmond Tutu 2× in 2 columns
Nobel peace prize winner, and the column's proof that famous men already wear skirts.
Men's lib could start with a little chiffon·Hearing reflects horrors but also a chance for hope
Digger Hobbs 2× in 1 column
Gardening columnist of great repute, consulted twice about the bean, and the one who identified it as a nasturtium.
Dolly Parton 4× in 3 columns
Singer. Her T-shirts were worn in the Lazar household.
Every mutt has its day·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·Turning red after being in the pink
Dolly Rathebe 2× in 1 column
Singer, honoured in a Johannesburg tribute concert in August 2001.
Dolores 1× in 1 column
Friend, known for her immeasurable tact, who calls a hamburger a mince ball and said he was the pits.
Dominic Rabinowitz 1× in 1 column
A friend of Jamie's; noticed Carol driving with her head out of the window.
Donna Wurzel 2× in 2 columns
Named in a list of status dinner guests, and again as someone who knows what it is to be stared at.
Bite the dust baby, cos here I come·A little bit of status gets you nowhere
Doug Hall 6× in 4 columns
Calls for Macaroni’s removal in A tragic tale.
A tragic tale·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·Democracy is a fragile plant·Taking a bath with the neighbours saves water
Doug Kydd not yet in the archive
Gave Carol the two-in-one bonsai.
Dov Fedler 1× in 1 column46 drawings
Cartoonist. Signed the drawings that ran with the column in The Sunday Star, and dated them, which is how a clipping with no masthead is placed in 1989. Years later: "for biting political comment and excellence of artistic execution, few can beat The Star's own Dov Fedler."
Dr Carbuncle 1× in 1 column
Dentist. Could fit an emergency in three weeks on Wednesday.
Dr K 1× in 1 column
The vet, who entered the waiting room to be asked whether he would live.
Dr Laszlo Toth 1× in 1 column
Of the state research centre in Budapest; authority on rates of hair loss.
Dr Peregrine Prakesh 1× in 1 column
Wrote on the pandemic of cold feet in a reputed medical journal.
Dr Reay Smithers 7× in 1 column
Author whose mammal reference book Carol takes on the Kruger trip.
Dr Spock 7× in 4 columns
Benjamin Spock, whose book advised on every move of the childbearing years, pimples included.
The day Walter curled up and died at Satara·Gardening tips stink·Is man really necessary?·Guru Spock moves over...
Dracula 2× in 2 columns
Would do his nut in a blood donor clinic. Leans on the counter of one in the drawing, allowing that he is in a similar line of business.
So who needs blood·Is later life just, well, a set of spare parts?
Dudley Moore 1× in 1 column
Offered, with Jerry Hall, as proof that opposites work. Hangs somewhere around the region of her kneecaps.
Dulcie 1× in 1 column
Divorced and razzling in Bangkok with a simply divine young man from the Swinging Singles Club.
Eddie Eckstein 2× in 2 columns
Comedian. Flew to the Algarve with boerewors to cheer up expatriates.
When life is just a bowl of kumquats·Ag shame for a world which is oh so deprived
Edric von Meyer 14× in 1 column
School friend of Jamie's. Brought the olives, then the jar from his father, then Grandmother Farah's, and vanished into the night after a fresh supply.
Einstein 1× in 1 column
What one mother's son was, at the science exhibition.
Elizabeth Taylor 6× in 4 columns
Her mother's estimate of her, offered as evidence that her mother's standards are faulty.
Bite the dust baby, cos here I come·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·Going the full Monty in hair dyes
Elize Botha 3× in 1 column
Wife of State President P W Botha; queen among the koeksisters, and a bobotie baker of great repute.
Ella Fitzgerald 1× in 1 column
Part of Carol's dowry: the latest recordings.
Emerson Fittipaldi 1× in 1 column
On hand, in the argument, to lend a driver a couple of bucks.
Emperor Bokassa 1× in 1 column
Betty's counter-example: charming, and with a hearty appetite.
Enrico Entwhistle 2× in 1 column
Neighbour. Lost thirteen rose bushes, two hibiscus and a plumbago in the path of a lawnmower.
Eric 5× in 2 columns
Of Radio Highveld, who greeted her with "How's your bladder?"
Up, up and away in a plastic bubble·When you croodle, you’ve moved beyond cuddling
Ermentrude Hink 1× in 1 column
Won R8 million and woke up bald. Probably invented.
Ernest Hemingway 3× in 3 columns
Named in the column.
When the cops caught the tunny run home·A fishy tale with a bite·The sweet smell of sexcess
Estelle 7× in 3 columns
Friend who left Arthur for a crayfish diver, to shock him into action; it was Arthur who left first.
Sad lament of a dried-out drudge·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·Who says our animals don't have spiritual souls?
Estelle 7× in 3 columns
In the cast of the school film. Locked in the loo.
Sad lament of a dried-out drudge·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·Who says our animals don't have spiritual souls?
Esther Lekgoate 1× in 1 column
Described as the mainstay of the Lazar household; went into labour during a succession of family crises.
Esther Tuttle 1× in 1 column
Of the knitting club. Thought going off to the wilds of Africa was brave.
Ethel 5× in 4 columns
Uncle Walter's idea of whose daughter Carol was.
Uncle Walter in long-Johns·Eat your heart out Jackie O·The ice-cream cone syndrome of life·Search is on to find – before 2000 – one aardvark
Ethne 1× in 1 column
Cousin, and a Real Mother: angel cake, chocolate delight and a savoury onion-and-herb tartlet at the flick of her fingertips.
Eugene TerreBlanche 14× in 5 columns
Leader of the AWB. "Froths when he talks."
In the thick of the brown·Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·Planet America is a wonder to behold·There are absolutely no flies on the Elixir of Life·ET and money make many very happy
Evil Knievel 1× in 1 column
"Eat your heart out, Evil Knievel." Spelt this way in the column.
Evita Buizendenhout 1× in 1 column
Pieter Dirk Uys's alter ego, spelt this way in the column.
F W de Klerk 17× in 13 columns
State President. His speech of 2 February 1990 opens more than one column.
I’m loo-sing out on the new SA·Blame it all on spinach·Democracy is a fragile plant·Matric blues and a new era·Let’s dress men up for a long life·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·Adverts' slogans power up our New South Africa·Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·Oh woe is me, now that the builders have all departed·I share a tub with Hillary Clinton·Touts at robots help usher in new SA·Nisson Mandra·Life in Cape Town
Fanny Thomas 1× in 1 column
Of Los Angeles, 113 years old and eating apple sauce three times a day.
Farrah Fawcett 2× in 2 columns
Actress. The hair Carol's children did not get.
Farrel Brenner 3× in 3 columns
Going to break Mark Spitz's breaststroke record at the Zoo Lake gala tonight.
Flush your worries away — ask the kids·Where have all the dumb kids gone?·So who invented New Year?
Fatima 11× in 2 columns
Ralph's girlfriend of the Morocco hitch-hiking summer.
So, what's a lion or two?·Troglodyte development planning for East Rand
Federico Garcia Lorca 1× in 1 column
Recited down the telephone by the crayfish diver.
Felix Thatch 6× in 1 column
Honeymooned at Sandy Bay, came out of the Atlantic and could not tell which naked sunbather was his wife.
Financial Asset 19× in 19 columns
Her husband, at his usual place at the table, asking for the salt.
Cast off the gherkins·Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·So who said fat was fun?·Supermother rides again·Business is hell·If music be the food of love . . . starve·The banana loaf mother strikes back·It’s a cat’s life·Business trips are hell·No beating about the bush·Exams are hell on the cells·We're all going on a cosy holiday·Gardening tips stink·So who needs a hog and a hyena in their lives?·Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·For whom the bell tolls: a hairy experience·Down Under wives pant for pay; here it’s zilch·Say a swift Howzit! on your teledivellicater·Heppy Klissimus brings out the dustbin men
Foo Ying Ling 2× in 1 column
The owner of the identical suitcase that went to Hong Kong, and now of a striped T-shirt and white Bermuda shorts.
Francisca 1× in 1 column
Divorcee friend who had recently acquired a mink coat from an admirer.
Francois Mitterrand 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Every mother has a cross to — bear some are heavier than others
Frank Fowden 1× in 1 column
Hairdresser. Took one look at Carol's coiffure and kept his eyes at collarbone level all evening.
Frank Sinatra 3× in 3 columns
Invoked as a solution to a bald spot.
So who said parties are such fun?·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·On a countdown to fall-out
Fred 8× in 7 columns
Phone Ted who said phone Fred who said phone Nic.
Blame it all on Schuyler·Well, hello Mother Christmas!·My daughter the fish·Cutting down trees isn't the only way to calm down·If only the ghost of old Hog would rise up and bite·Ho hum, soon it will be the end of yet another era·A mal jol in the mall to mark millennium’s end
Freddie Lekgoate 1× in 1 column
Esther’s baby, whose arrival added to the household’s emergencies.
Gaby 9× in 5 columns
In the bathroom gargling her throat, which is why the line was free.
Blame it on Mr Bell·Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·Mammoth mother strikes again·The banana loaf mother strikes back·When jogging goes to Carol’s head
Galen 1× in 1 column
The ancient Greek physician who, the children reported over supper, coined the word gonorrhoea.
Ge Korsten 1× in 1 column
The tenor, at full blast on a neighbour's radio in the Kruger Park, in competition with a lion.
Genghis Khan 1× in 1 column
Swept down like a warthog on the anthill. An authoritarian despot, and in that respect not the Lazar household.
George 12× in 6 columns
The other diving instructor, named with Gerald.
Scuba divers do it deeper·Stubby’s farewell a pulverised garden·Hearing reflects horrors but also a chance for hope·Only a mug thinks crime is confined to Gauteng·The break up of Spice Girls may have sunk our rand·Where, oh where have all the Beetles gone?
Georgie 2× in 1 column
Hopping everywhere on points, and doing everything in step with Natalie.
Gerald 5× in 2 columns
One of the two diving instructors, ex-navy and very professional looking.
Scuba divers do it deeper·Home alone at night can be an alarming experience
Geraldine Hatchett 4× in 1 column
Convener of the Zoo Lake Mothers' League. Spat out her cigar and called on mothers of the world to unite.
Mothers of the world unite for you have only brown paper to lose
Gerda Feitelbaum 3× in 2 columns
One of Carol's mother's Cape Town tea circle. Her grandson could do calculus at three; her car was reversed into on Corlett Drive.
Where have all the dumb kids gone?·So who said parties are such fun?
Gerrie Coetzee 16× in 3 columns
The boxer. "Gerrie Coetzee's fighting Michael Dokes. Are you on?", and the yell that opens the column, GERRIE FOR PRIME MINISTER.
Fasten your helmets and your false teeth·Gerrie for Prime Minister·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria
Gershon Ginkel 18× in 4 columns
A dogmatic man. Slept in the dog's basket for several nights, and moved in with a sheepdog after the marriage ended.
Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·Boerewors is the bane of my life·There's a mini-millionaire in our backyard·Let’s dress men up for a long life
Gertie Drabble 2× in 1 column
Calls to congratulate Carol after seeing her sons performing music.
Gertrude Ginkel 13× in 2 columns
The super-mother of the northern suburbs: tuck mother, swimming mother, pawn person of the chess club. Carol hates her.
Who hates Gertrude Ginkel?·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol
Gertrude Thatch not yet in the archive
Honeymooned at Sandy Bay. Her husband could not pick her out among the sunbathers.
Gianni Galoshi 1× in 1 column
Of Milan, who makes an open-plan shoe.
Gill Sagar 3× in 1 column
Organised the Sandton SPCA mutt show with Rosemary Kell.
Gittel 2× in 2 columns
Great-great-great Uncle Boruch's wife, who embroidered the Chantilly lace tablecloth. From Chantilly, or possibly Dwinsk.
Cold feet will always fry·The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style
Gladys Greenbaum 1× in 1 column
The perfectly matched wife on the telephone: he takes the breast of the chicken, she takes the thigh, and they have been squeezing the toothpaste tube from opposite ends for 25 years.
Glenda Kemp 1× in 1 column
Snake dancer, a South African talking point through the 1970s, and a 14-year-old's reason for needing an extra R1,50.
Gloria Rootshtain 3× in 1 column
Cook of cooks, chairman of The Cookery and Food Association (SA) and author of "Cookery with a Connoisseur". Sent the invitation.
Graca Machel 1× in 1 column
Nelson Mandela married her on his 80th birthday, and the column calls her his newest and last love.
Graham 11× in 7 columns
Going camping with Jamie, Simon and Jason.
Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen·Oh ring where is thy ding a ling a ling?·When life is just a bowl of kumquats·We're all going on a cosy holiday·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·Forget soaps, just switch to pre-election politicians
Grandmother Farah 3× in 1 column
Edric's grandmother and the Master Olive Maker, whose recipe stays in the family.
Great Big Director 1× in 1 column
Of cheese scones in the sky, addressed in her little prayer.
Greta Abrahamson 2× in 2 columns
Named, with Peter Soldatos, as the sort of person for whom dressmaking instructions are simple enough.
Eat your heart out Margot·I guess other mothers have trees too ...
Greta Ginkel 2× in 2 columns
Book club member. "Goodness gracious, this is big bucks."
Gretchen Ginkel 2× in 2 columns
Book club member. Would go for something a little closer to home, and did not hear the reply.
Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·Our temple takes a tumble
Gretchen Ginkle 1× in 1 column
Her husband wins a sweepstake in Carol’s account of childhood friends.
Gretchen Google 10× in 1 column
The bane, and the super-mother who always bakes real chocolate cakes. The 1980 telling of the same column calls her Gertrude Ginkel.
Every mother has a cross to — bear some are heavier than others
Gretchen Hogg 1× in 1 column
Bookclub. Her daughter dresses for two hours and three wardrobes before a date.
Gretchen Schnibbelfussen 2× in 1 column
Of the hotel at Schonwald. "A schmall tree is no goot, it must be a vide vun."
Griselda van Tonder 1× in 1 column
Whose son borrowed her Pascual culottes for a party and spilt a hotdog down the front.
Guiseppe 6× in 5 columns
Cyril's predecessor at the salon, of Italy. Printed thus, for Giuseppe.
So who said parties are such fun?·When hair should never happen·Revolution of the fig leaf generation·Roll out the pastry, your country needs you.·A book, a bough, a glass of wine and that’s it
Guiseppe 67× in 49 columns
Barry's good friend, called Juice. Also one of the three who arrived in virginal white looking like an incipient guru.
Who said Valentines were soppy?·Life is one big yoyo·Boating's for the birds·Groovy movie·Every mother deserves one·Uncle Walter in long-Johns·So who said parties are such fun?·Happy Father's Day to you·A little flu goes a long way·When hair should never happen·So who's afraid of crocs?·What goes thump in the dark?·Every father deserves his day·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·So who says fresh air is healthy?·Revolution of the fig leaf generation·Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·A toothy tale about headgear·Roll out the pastry, your country needs you.·A book, a bough, a glass of wine and that’s it·Hey, look! It’s big Les and little Carol on the mean machine·Drink champagne and do your bit for South Africa·The banana loaf mother strikes back·Never give up in a tight spot·Help! help! I’m a prisoner in a body·Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·Every mother needs a book club·A little drama in life goes a long way·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·Come the revolution·Exams are hell on the cells·Life's a bowl of olives·If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away·Clothes to rend the family apart·There's a mini-millionaire in our backyard·The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style·Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·A versatile bowl fits two fish sandwiches·Say a swift Howzit! on your teledivellicater·Flushed with success in toiletry trade·The day my daughter turned into a swan·Beware my little fender bender·Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·Romance sparkles – and dims·Examining the inexact science of weather forecasting·Soon we'll be gobbling Karoo 'land langoustines'·CD-Roms way beyond the ken of anyone over 4·Camping out for an ID and passing for ‘coloured’·Chef in the making – and what a pain
Gus Silber 1× in 1 column
Writer, named alongside James Clarke and Arthur Goldstuck.
Guy Fawkes 1× in 1 column
Benchmark for a dangerous electrical system.
Gysie Pienaar 2× in 1 column
Springbok fullback of the 1980 season, shouted for from the stand.
Harry Dugmore 1× in 1 column
With Stephen Francis and Rico Schacherl, created Madam & Eve in 1992.
Harry Magnus 2× in 1 column
General Tyres marketing man who arranged the bush tyre demonstration.
Harry Oppenheimer 4× in 4 columns
Mining magnate. On the guest list for the pet gala.
Who said Valentines were soppy?·Up, up and away in a plastic bubble·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·Johanna gets first-class treatment at a state hospital
Harry Viljoen 1× in 1 column
The coach, outside whose door Johanna cannot go and stand with a poster.
Hatchet-face 3× in 1 column
The one who nudges her in the ribs at the ballet.
Henry Miller 1× in 1 column
In the bath, in the household's reading list.
Henry von Aardvork 5× in 1 column
An enterprising Austrian immigrant, credited in the column with the invention.
Herbert Klongthorpe not yet in the archive
Held that the only suitable place for the dog to sleep was the marital bed, won the argument, and woke to find he had won it too well.
Herbie Snodwick 6× in 1 column
Six years old, and the source of 11, then 21, then 24 exercise books to cover in his first week at school.
Mothers of the world unite for you have only brown paper to lose
Herman Cocklethwaite 24× in 6 columns
Her bridegroom: lost her on the way to Lanzerac, cracked a rib when the beds parted at Mosselbay, and burnt lobster red at Plettenberg Bay.
Sometimes, the bald truth hurts more than anything·The naked truth·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria·Cold feet search nightly for a pair of warm thighs·Troglodyte development planning for East Rand·Secondhand Norman storms along
Herman Greenbaum 8× in 1 column
Acquaintance whose hair transplant, read about in the paper, became a breakfast-table campaign.
Herman van Tonder 1× in 1 column
Of Potloodsrus. Invented the portable thermos bucket against cold feet.
Hermione Adelhead 4× in 2 columns
Phoned with wonderful news.
Every mother needs a book club·Life is just a bar of wormy chocolate
Herschel 3× in 2 columns
A boy who, Ralph reports, is going to beat Bjorn Borg.
Flush your worries away — ask the kids·Where have all the dumb kids gone?
Hilda Bloggs 1× in 1 column
Of the gardening club; her euphorbia was frost-bitten.
Honeybunch 3× in 1 column
How the one-woman show addresses the household while leaving it the tree.
Horace Capesmith 1× in 1 column
Neighbour, 84, who swallowed his false teeth during the cricket.
Horace Hawke 1× in 1 column
Of Tuscan, Arizona, on the telephone.
Humphonius Polonius 2× in 1 column
Invented chief of staff to Totius Claudius, and worried about what the women would wear.
Humphrey Throgthwistle 1× in 1 column
A banker in the same fantasy.
Humphry 1× in 1 column
Gladys Greenbaum's husband. Likes his curry hot enough to melt his upper dental plate.
Hung Wang Chen 2× in 1 column
World expert on bonsai horticulture. Advised solitary confinement.
Hymie Cohen 1× in 1 column
Glazed the windscreen in the advertisement.
Ian Patrick 1× in 1 column
Co-director of the school film, on a tight budget.
Ibrahim El Korimiy 2× in 1 column
165-year-old Egyptian. Ten eggs for dinner, a new wife, and a 98-year-old son.
Idi Amin 2× in 2 columns
Worse dinner company than a fruit fly.
Hey! Watchit Greek islands — here comes Momma Lazar!·There are absolutely no flies on the Elixir of Life
Irma Wock 3× in 1 column
The other of the Cape Town tea circle. Her granddaughter danced the dying swan, and her grandsons played and painted.
Irwin Gum 1× in 1 column
Trichologist consulted on the matter of 101 hairs.
Isaac Xulu 1× in 1 column
Xhosa colleague who accused Carol of linguistic partisanship.
Ivor Maurice 2× in 2 columns
Her late father. Maya Ilana is named after him, which she notes is a Jewish tradition.
Maya is Born·Well hello, Maya, it's nice to know you're here at last
J M Coetzee 1× in 1 column
South African novelist. Dashed through at the book club in three minutes flat.
Jack Sprat 1× in 1 column
"Before I could say Jack Sprat, or something equally intellectual."
Jackie Shulman 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Jacqueline Onassis 12× in 6 columns
The byword for a glamorous life afloat; a yacht in the Indian Ocean was measured against her.
Flush your worries away — ask the kids·Eat your heart out Jackie O·It's a perfectly opposite life·My daughter the fish·So who needs Disney World when we’ve got the Rand Show?·Life is just a bar of wormy chocolate
James Clarke 5× in 3 columns
Writer, named for the wit that makes her chortle out aloud.
Touts at robots help usher in new SA·Naturally, Prince Charles and I talked hydrangeas·Politically correct language
James Dean not yet in the archive
The voice Jamie puts on when nobody understands him.
James Joyce 1× in 1 column
"Have you ever read 'Ulysses' by James Joyce?" she ventured timidly.
Jamie 456× in 161 columns
Son. Ten years old in 1981; an astute critic of art.
Bath blues·The toothmouse strikes again·Oh death where is thy sting?·Flush your worries away — ask the kids·Property tycoon trauma·Sardines in the sand·A louse in time saves nine·Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Who hates Gertrude Ginkel?·Who said Valentines were soppy?·Life is one big yoyo·Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·Every mother deserves one·The sad demise of Horace·Of plague ... and things·Uncle Walter in long-Johns·So who said parties are such fun?·Happy Father's Day to you·Gone fishin' ... or something·A little flu goes a long way·In the bush with the terrors·When boerewors is the bane of life·So who invented New Year?·You're in the army now·Who invented the fork anyway?·Frostbite can be fun·And the turkey came too·There's a blight in my bath·Culture vulture strikes again·1982 — the year of the mole cricket·Mothers of the world unite for you have only brown paper to lose·Strike of the unpaid domestic engineers·So who wants to be a fish?·I always wanted to be a bat·Holidays hardly happen·A toothy tale about headgear·Roll out the pastry, your country needs you.·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·Sex is here to stay·A book, a bough, a glass of wine and that’s it·So who’s busy?·Stimulate your sole·Hark, the Jewish angel sings·The night we saw the Pope and the peppermints tasted funny·Things aren’t what they used to be – or what they should be for that matter·Meet my daughter the plant monitor·When death is a welcome release·There’s nothing quite like drowning to keep you fit·Speed gets the adrenalin going·Every mother needs a newspaper round in her life·When the cops caught the tunny run home·Drink champagne and do your bit for South Africa·Oh death where is thy sting?·The diningroom table’s the backbone of the family: Help! We’ve just collapsed·Needed now — inflatable mum for deflated dad·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·C’mon, plug into a whole new way of life·Every mother has a cross to — bear some are heavier than others·I guess other mothers have trees too ...·Gerrie for Prime Minister·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria·Help! help! I’m a prisoner in a body·They call it high-flying living·Help, help, there’s a hell’s angel trying to get out·Motherhood — it’s a great big crying rip-off·Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·The Great Trek strikes again·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen·Scuba divers do it deeper·So who needs romance on St Valentine's Day?·Beauty takes to the bush·A tragic tale·All about camels, cogs and turkeys and other things·My daughter the fish·Raindrops keep falling on my head·A little drama in life goes a long way·A murderer or saint?·So who needs Disney World when we’ve got the Rand Show?·The day Walter curled up and died at Satara·Every mother should have her day·King Alfred never made a mountain out of a cupcake·Let it all hang out·Every dog should have his day·Who said running is fun?·A little home cooking to soup-up Zola·Every mother should have a Jody Scheckter in her life·She’s just a talking skunk·Every back should have its day ... or seven·If you haven’t stuffed cannelloni ... you really haven’t lived·Happiness is when your son has a date for the matric dance·It’s spring and sex is in the air·You know what? Enough is enough·Oh ring where is thy ding a ling a ling?·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·Heppy Klissimus to you, too·Never mind the lumps in the jam — it’s the thought that counts·It’s a cat’s life·When the stay-fit freak strikes again·Business trips are hell·So, who needs to Loop a Star?·When life is just a bowl of kumquats·For the father who has everything·Exams are hell on the cells·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·If food be the music of love, eat on·We're all going on a cosy holiday·Who's hanging up on life?·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Gardening tips stink·Life's a bowl of olives·Who says every mom has to suffer? The traffic department·Uteri for hire·Who's having a ball?·Boerewors is the bane of my life·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away·Men's lib could start with a little chiffon·Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·It could probably happen to anyone·So who needs a hog and a hyena in their lives?·Naked is nice . . . so they say·Is man really necessary?·Clothes to rend the family apart·There's a mini-millionaire in our backyard·The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style·Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·Full marks for matric tact and tactics·On the slippery slope to fame·We've been harbouring a friendly alien·Braving the depths of life in a wetsuit·I'm the Queen of the crumbling castle·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·For whom the bell tolls: a hairy experience·Flushed with success in toiletry trade·The rise and fall of a Jewish Santa·Joining the club in university of life·Raisins are tasty, but children are more filling·Blame it all on spinach·Who says it’s just a game?·It’s enough to make you ask what’s in a name·It’s not junk, it’s our history·In the thick of the brown·So, what's a lion or two?·Surprise visit cleaned us out·Hot water and a bald head·Matric blues and a new era·Serving up the perfect vac job·Some dags cakked under the strine·Naked truth of saying goodbye·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·Why didn’t I do this all before?·The day the grapevine broke down·Clutch gets into high gear·Cricket, mealies and joy of being mother-in-law-to-be·Full feed ahead with the Jewish mother syndrome·Maya is Born·Well hello, Maya, it's nice to know you're here at last·New Year's Eve·Who is this amazing cook and whiz with the vacuum?
Jan van Riebeeck 2× in 2 columns
Founder of the Cape settlement in 1652. Joshua is said to resemble a suntanned one.
Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·Heppy Klissimus brings out the dustbin men
Jan Witbooi 1× in 1 column
Calibrated the petrol gauge in the advertisement.
Jane Fogg 1× in 1 column
Professional wardrobe mistress, who ran up a sailor suit in fifteen minutes after five failed attempts at home.
Jane Fonda 7× in 7 columns
The desired intellect.
Every fried egg will have its day·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·It's a perfectly opposite life·The Great Trek strikes again·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away·Beating the gym-workout syndrome
Janene Brown 10× in 1 column
Australian Rotary exchange student from Mywee, hosted for three months. Impersonated at her farewell by Jamie in a doek.
Janet Reger 1× in 1 column
Lingerie designer. The silk nightie Carol did not get for Mother's Day. Set on the page as "Reager".
Janet Suzman 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Jason 3× in 3 columns
Going camping in the same party.
Every mutt has its day·When life is just a bowl of kumquats·We're all going on a cosy holiday
Jean-Pierre Rives 2× in 1 column
France's flank and captain on the 1980 tour; a beautiful head of hair, and he speaks French fluently.
Jenny 4× in 3 columns
"Hey, Jenny. I'm looking for a cottage."
The Great Trek strikes again·Boerewors will overcome·Die rubriek is ook in Afrikaans beskikbaar ...
Jeremiah 5× in 2 columns
Very helpful, when she was put on to him.
Who said life was just one big hoot?·Our temple takes a tumble
Jeremy Taylor 1× in 1 column
Wrote "Ag Pleez Daddy", which she grew up to the strains of.
Jerry Hall 1× in 1 column
Tall, magnificent, blonde and as slender as a giant baseball bat.
JG Strydom 1× in 1 column
Prime Minister, 1954-58. His head, under its inverted tea cup, was considered as a campsite.
Jimmy Carter 1× in 1 column
His gum-to-gum smile, given to her out of the smog-filled distance.
Joanne 1× in 1 column
One of the children whose toothmouse paid 20c, four times what Nicky's left.
Jody Scheckter 5× in 4 columns
The South African who won the 1979 world championship; held up as a man who never had to drive with a tennis racket digging into him.
Sardines in the sand·Mothers of the world unite·Speed gets the adrenalin going·Every mother should have a Jody Scheckter in her life
Joe Cool van Schalkwyk 6× in 2 columns
Beside her in the bush, rubbing on fresh air moisturiser.
Joe Parker 1× in 1 column
Comedian, telling Van der Merwe jokes over the braaied mealies.
Joffee 4× in 1 column
Schoolfriend of the oldest son, and the star of the film shot on the Lazars' front lawn.
Johan Claasens 1× in 1 column
A rugby ball in the likeness of his head, in the wedding souvenirs.
Johanna Cupido 28× in 5 columns
Trudy Shulman's companion. Watches every Test from the flat above Newlands and calls Jonah Lomu Die Bleddy Boom.
Vinning is vot counts, and our Boks did so in style·Johanna gets first-class treatment at a state hospital·Hell hath no fury like those irritated by cellphones·Resolving this wee matter would be joy·Die Bleddy Boom
Johannes Nel 5× in 2 columns
Roodepoort resident seeking help with a camel story for his granddaughter.
All about camels, cogs and turkeys and other things·Ma needs her car in a hurry down here on Earth
Johannes Tshabalala 11× in 4 columns
The gardener who promised the greenest grass in the neighbourhood.
So who needs green grass?·All about camels, cogs and turkeys and other things·Die rubriek is ook in Afrikaans beskikbaar ...·Beneficial roll of the dice in sleepy dorp
John Brooker 1× in 1 column
Sandton businessman who sold the rhino.
John Combs 1× in 1 column
Devon farmer restored to full hair by a Jersey cow called Primrose.
John Heinrich 1× in 1 column
Sizzling in a sauna in the Valentine's Day daydream.
John McEnroe 2× in 1 column
What was itching to get out from inside the knock knees and the fat.
John Sheppard 1× in 1 column
Led the Basel team that doubled the life of the fruit fly.
John Travolta 5× in 4 columns
He gave her a long John Travolta stare, flashed his dimple and smiled.
The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria·Every mother needs a thief in her life
Johnny 14× in 11 columns
Nicky's boyfriend. Slept in Barry's room.
Jogging's for the birds·So who needs to speak English these days?·Gerrie for Prime Minister·My daughter the fish·Anyone for a culture shock?·Meet my son the rock star·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·Ag shame for a world which is oh so deprived·Raisins are tasty, but children are more filling·Sons, daughters, decisions and dual standards·Naked truth of saying goodbye
Johnny Clegg 3× in 3 columns
Musician. Nicky belonged to the Johnny Clegg Adoration Society.
Meet my son the rock star·Ag shame for a world which is oh so deprived·Naked truth of saying goodbye
Johnny Halberstadt 1× in 1 column
The runner. He came through the front door like a beardless one of him.
Johnny Sacke 3× in 3 columns
Came late to the dinner of twenty. A Jonathan Sacke appears elsewhere in the archive. Well-known Johannesburg music man, arranging a big gig.
Gerrie for Prime Minister·Meet my son the rock star·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life
Jojo 1× in 1 column
Lennie Sak's cartoon character, who she says wormed his way in.
Jonah Lomu 1× in 1 column
The All Black wing. Johanna Cupido calls him Die Bleddy Boom.
Jonathan Sacke 1× in 1 column
Schoolfriend who proposed an in-depth on-site investigation of the economic viability of Bophuthatswana, at the tables.
Joost van der Westhuizen 3× in 3 columns
Rugby player, named with Breyten Paulse.
'Crazee' that a lack of a 'kick hair' lost us Test·Listen up Mallett! My old mom has some ideas·Die Bleddy Boom
Joshua 7× in 1 column
The drain cleaner who cleaned no drains and left R25 richer.
Josias 9× in 2 columns
The gardener, spreading kraal manure, who diagnosed a broken toe correctly.
Heppy Klissimus to you, too·Josias the kraal manure spreader knows his toes
Juice 61× in 46 columns
Cameraman on the school film, known artistically as Juice to the other. Left the lens cap on.
Who said Valentines were soppy?·Life is one big yoyo·Boating's for the birds·Groovy movie·Every mother deserves one·Uncle Walter in long-Johns·Happy Father's Day to you·A little flu goes a long way·So who's afraid of crocs?·What goes thump in the dark?·Every father deserves his day·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·So who says fresh air is healthy?·Revolution of the fig leaf generation·Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·A toothy tale about headgear·Roll out the pastry, your country needs you.·Hey, look! It’s big Les and little Carol on the mean machine·Drink champagne and do your bit for South Africa·The banana loaf mother strikes back·Never give up in a tight spot·Help! help! I’m a prisoner in a body·Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·Every mother needs a book club·A little drama in life goes a long way·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·Come the revolution·Exams are hell on the cells·Life's a bowl of olives·If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away·Clothes to rend the family apart·There's a mini-millionaire in our backyard·The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style·Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·A versatile bowl fits two fish sandwiches·Say a swift Howzit! on your teledivellicater·Flushed with success in toiletry trade·The day my daughter turned into a swan·Beware my little fender bender·Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·Romance sparkles – and dims·Examining the inexact science of weather forecasting·Soon we'll be gobbling Karoo 'land langoustines'·CD-Roms way beyond the ken of anyone over 4·Camping out for an ID and passing for ‘coloured’·Chef in the making – and what a pain
Julie 2× in 2 columns
Child in the lift scheme. Her mother phoned to say the wrong child was eating meatballs in the diningroom.
A little flu goes a long way·When a country hick takes on the USA
Karin Landsberg 8× in 3 columns
An animal behaviour consultant called in to deal with two puppies.
Boris was Hugo looking for love·Listen up Mallett! My old mom has some ideas·Animal behaviour consultant
Karl Marx 1× in 1 column
Who, according to the quiz her children learnt from, founded capitalism.
Kati Hess 2× in 1 column
Janene's next host mother. Greeted a bulging six-foot Janene most warmly.
Kean 13× in 6 columns
Friend of the children, a highly-talented cyclist, still needing a lift home at half past midnight five months later. The paper sets him Kean and Ken in the same column.
Where have all the dumb kids gone?·So who said parties are such fun?·Tall, dark and handsome·Die rubriek is ook in Afrikaans beskikbaar ...·CD-Roms way beyond the ken of anyone over 4·Politically correct language
Kepler Wessels 1× in 1 column
Captained South Africa at the 1992 Cricket World Cup.
Kevin Costner 1× in 1 column
Actor. The rugby captain looks like him but is a cretinous half-wit.
Kevin Feldscher 1× in 1 column
Backup performer in Barry and Ralph’s band.
Kevin McGee 5× in 3 columns
The second-hand car dealer who sold Carol her Opel Monza. "Carol, the steering's a dog."
Meet my son the rock star·Sons, daughters, decisions and dual standards·Take Norman, my car
Kim Bassinger 1× in 1 column
The alternative to Jane Fonda, ruled out on the grounds of plastic surgery and a cylinder head gasket. Printed thus.
If you feel like exercising just lie down until the feeling goes away
King Kong 2× in 2 columns
What a child can grow up imagining he is, take your pick with Prince Charles.
King Mongal 1× in 1 column
Of Siam, who had nine, poor old thing.
Klaus Grogor 5× in 1 column
Of the House of Sports Cars, who let a mother of four loose in a Lamborghini Espada and went grey in ten minutes.
Kobus Poggenpoel 1× in 1 column
Not lying beside Carol at four in the morning either.
Lance 4× in 1 column
Friend who hired a Santa Claus suit for his two little girls and spent two hours wedged in his own chimney.
Lannice Snyman 3× in 1 column
Whose book 'Fresh from the Sea' started the whole thing off.
Lauren Pasvol 1× in 1 column
Miriam's daughter, of the blonde hair and great determination, and a learner licence.
Lazar 166× in 100 columns
The family: six of them, plus assorted dogs.
Heppy Klissimus·A louse in time saves nine·Happy Father's Day to you·When spare parts hardly happen·Culture vulture·Strange things happen in the dark·Bite the dust baby, cos here I come·So who said fat was fun?·Who invented the fork anyway?·So who's afraid of crocs?·Blame it on Mr Bell·Business is hell·Every father deserves his day·There's a blight in my bath·Culture vulture strikes again·The silk sheet syndrome·So who needs a dreamhouse?·1982 — the year of the mole cricket·Holidays hardly happen·So who's got time to live these days?·A toothy tale about headgear·Roll out the pastry, your country needs you.·Who says it's a dog's life?·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·It's toothmouse time and the gold price is up·A skeleton out of the cupboard·A book, a bough, a glass of wine and that’s it·So who’s busy?·Is later life just, well, a set of spare parts?·Hey, look! It’s big Les and little Carol on the mean machine·The night we saw the Pope and the peppermints tasted funny·Christmas comes but once a year – thank heavens·Things aren’t what they used to be – or what they should be for that matter·Watchit! Here comes Niki Lauda Lazar!·So who needs to speak English these days?·Every mother needs a newspaper round in her life·When parents and teachers meet — life’s always exciting·When the cops caught the tunny run home·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·Hey! Watchit Greek islands — here comes Momma Lazar!·Flying high in hospital·Never give up in a tight spot·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·C’mon, plug into a whole new way of life·Gerrie for Prime Minister·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria·They call it high-flying living·The Great Trek strikes again·All about camels, cogs and turkeys and other things·My daughter the fish·A little drama in life goes a long way·King Alfred never made a mountain out of a cupcake·Let it all hang out·There’s nothing quite like camping·A little home cooking to soup-up Zola·Every mutt has its day·Momma is marooned on an island paradise·Oh ring where is thy ding a ling a ling?·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·Poor Dubowitz bites the dust·Heppy Klissimus to you, too·Never mind the lumps in the jam — it’s the thought that counts·It’s a cat’s life·No beating about the bush·When life is just a bowl of kumquats·Exams are hell on the cells·A kiss is just a kiss·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·Who's hanging up on life?·Life's a bowl of olives·Who says every mom has to suffer? The traffic department·Help! I've got a teenage daughter·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·There's a mini-millionaire in our backyard·The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·A versatile bowl fits two fish sandwiches·Congrats, for thousands of us, might be in order·Some dags cakked under the strine·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·British hack blasphemed noble ritual·Love’s but the frailty of mind·Clutch gets into high gear·Touts at robots help usher in new SA·Taking a bath with the neighbours saves water·Husband or jacuzzi? Is there a real choice?·Army surplus store proved to be accommodating·Treasure the teachers - most of them are gems·Hotstuff Lazar cc will take a wait off your mind·New Year's Eve·Richmonds are aberrations·Lazar of Arabia, and the groin pain was worth it·The Generation Gap·Yankee grandchild’s biltong delights·Three down and only one to go ...·Good times, bad times in a heartbeat·Noo-Noo and the shosholoza angel·Animal behaviour consultant
Len Ashton 2× in 1 column
Fellow judge at the Sandton SPCA Mutt of the Year Show.
Len Deighton 1× in 1 column
Who she was stretched out on the sofa with.
Lennie Sak 1× in 1 column
The Sowetan's cartoonist, who drew the character Jojo.
Lennie Shulman 6× in 2 columns
A lost father with a very clever wife.
So who needs Disney World when we’ve got the Rand Show?·Politically correct language
Leonardo da Vinci 12× in 4 columns
What another mother's daughter was.
Where have all the dumb kids gone?·A skeleton out of the cupboard·Making a mother out of Leonardo·Those weekends just ain’t long enough
Leonie 3× in 1 column
Ralph’s partner for the matric dance.
Leora 4× in 4 columns
Practising deep breathing in the bedroom before the evening session.
Blame it on Mr Bell·Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·The banana loaf mother strikes back·When jogging goes to Carol’s head
Les Lloyd-Adams 3× in 1 column
Chairman of the Human Companion Animal Bond Society, quoted in defence of six dogs, a cat, two gold fish, a pregnant hamster and 5 000 silk worms.
Lily Finkelstein 1× in 1 column
Of the gardening circle; her calendulas had cut worm.
Lisa Blecher 1× in 1 column
Director of the school film, who wept into her fleece-lined anorak.
Loda Mphela 25× in 9 columns
Gardening consultant of twenty years' standing. Ordered the chicken manure, then ordered it dug up again, and settled at last for horse urine.
Hey! Watchit Greek islands — here comes Momma Lazar!·Flying high in hospital·Who says the grass is always greener on the other side ...?·Gardening tips stink·The gift in pink: chicken manure·Taking a bath with the neighbours saves water·If only the ghost of old Hog would rise up and bite·Army surplus store proved to be accommodating·Who is this amazing cook and whiz with the vacuum?
Lucia 12× in 2 columns
Monde Mbomlambe's wife, a daily sleep-out char.
Sometimes good things do happen to good people·Life in Cape Town
Lunga Buthelezi 1× in 1 column
Young contortionist, South Africa's own human pretzel, who performs for the UniverSoul Circus and sends her pay home.
Lyndall Popper 1× in 1 column
Chef. Compiled menus for canine and piscatory palates.
Lynne Wise 3× in 2 columns
Teacher whose telephone calls feature among the family’s school emergencies.
A little drama in life goes a long way·Treasure the teachers - most of them are gems
Madame Defarge 1× in 1 column
Barry complains that she was in the French Revolution.
Madonna 3× in 2 columns
On one of the four tapedecks, the summer the sons came home from Cape Town.
Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·Going the full Monty in hair dyes
Magnus Malan 6× in 4 columns
South African Minister of Defence through the 1980s. Telephoned, in her account, to be told how lucky he was to be getting her son, and would look grand in a flashing sequinned puffball skirt.
Roll out the pastry, your country needs you.·Men's lib could start with a little chiffon·On a countdown to fall-out·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking
Maid Marion 1× in 1 column
From the lonely hearts advertisement: middle-aged Maid Marion needs dashing, different, poetry-reading and sensuous company.
Mandy 14× in 6 columns
The friend Nicky telephoned on getting home, to say she had nothing to wear.
Fasten your helmets and your false teeth·We're all going on a cosy holiday·Help! I've got a teenage daughter·Braving the depths of life in a wetsuit·Trapped with a teenage daughter·Say a swift Howzit! on your teledivellicater
Mandy Goldstein 6× in 2 columns
Nicky's friend; the reason a working telephone is not a luxury.
We're all going on a cosy holiday·Trapped with a teenage daughter
Mango Buthelezi 2× in 2 columns
As Home Affairs is imagined announcing it: "Today we regard Mango Buthelezi to be a controlling digit."
Camping out for an ID and passing for ‘coloured’·New ID Books
Margaret Thatcher 2× in 2 columns
Named in the column.
Business trips are hell·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking
Margie 5× in 3 columns
A fellow swimming mother at the Zoo Lake gala.
Oh death where is thy sting?·Every father deserves his day·Full feed ahead with the Jewish mother syndrome
Margot Fonteyn 6× in 4 columns
The ballerina, the standard by which a six-year-old in a church hall is judged.
The knock-kneed protege·Eat your heart out Margot·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·Only a mug thinks crime is confined to Gauteng
Marie Pronk 1× in 1 column
Lost her son behind his hair, and cannot tell which way he faces at breakfast.
Marilyn Monroe 4× in 4 columns
"Whodya think you are? Marilyn Monroe on toast?"
Groovy movie·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·Needed now — inflatable mum for deflated dad·Beating the gym-workout syndrome
Marion 22× in 14 columns
Book club member. Authority on Scottish sheep and their capped teeth.
Sometimes, the bald truth hurts more than anything·Sad lament of a dried-out drudge·Every father deserves his day·Mammoth mother strikes again·Hark, the Jewish angel sings·A little home cooking to soup-up Zola·Momma is marooned on an island paradise·Never mind the lumps in the jam — it’s the thought that counts·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·On the slippery slope to fame·Old age or not, 10 eggs per meal is murder·Smiles grow stiff amidst all the goodwill·Get away from it all with a 7-year hitch·It all began when I was a birthday gift
Marion Hamberger 1× in 1 column
Lent the maroon and blue ski suit, and never wanted to see it again.
Mark Spitz 5× in 4 columns
The swimmer whose breaststroke record is to be broken at the Zoo Lake gala.
Flush your worries away — ask the kids·The diningroom table’s the backbone of the family: Help! We’ve just collapsed·Help! help! I’m a prisoner in a body·My daughter the fish
Marty Feldman 2× in 1 column
"Look at Woody Allen, at Marty Feldman, at Piet Koornhof."
Marvin Alkin 15× in 7 columns
Childhood suitor, half her size and troubled by post nasal drip.
So who needs romance on St Valentine's Day?·A kiss is just a kiss·Birthday greetings ‘Kos’ a fortune·A smack on the kisser for the New South Africa·Packing with a spouse not a bonding experience ...·Koopsiekte inevitable in shopping malls of the US·Able housekeepers and admirable ‘romantic’ tactics
Mary Decker 4× in 1 column
The runner Zola Budd would be left standing by, once the chicken soup had done its work. Carol says Mary Becker and is corrected.
Mary Shaver 4× in 1 column
Of New York. Went on strike as a mother in February 1982 and piled the week's washing on the front stoep, which is where this column begins.
Mary Tyler-Moore 1× in 1 column
Her show was drowned out by the sound of scratching.
Master Chef 1× in 1 column
Her husband, as he is fondly known after the cookery classes.
Mata Hari 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Maureen 7× in 5 columns
Friend. Told Carol she was a household name, "like Omo".
Heppy Klissimus·Every father deserves his day·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·Forget soaps, just switch to pre-election politicians
Maya Lazar 51× in 8 columns
Granddaughter, born in Buffalo on 17 November 1998 and named for Carol's late father Ivor Maurice. Calls her grandmother Noo-Noo.
There's a great new way of meeting people in SA·Maya is Born·Well hello, Maya, it's nice to know you're here at last·Next century will be good for women and my Maya·Maya·Yankee grandchild’s biltong delights·Noo-Noo and the shosholoza angel·Mr Tannenboim
Medzhid Agayev 1× in 1 column
Of Tikyaband. Ate yoghurt, herded sheep for 120 years, fathered 151 children.
Melissa 30× in 8 columns
Barry's wife, an American; married in the oldest synagogue in the Americas, on St Thomas.
So who said parties are such fun?·A toothy tale about headgear·So who needs romance on St Valentine's Day?·The multitudes left us mauled, bruised – and grateful·Cricket, mealies and joy of being mother-in-law-to-be·Maya is Born·Well hello, Maya, it's nice to know you're here at last·Yankee grandchild’s biltong delights
Melissa Fudge 1× in 1 column
The rival, aged 11. Received Vic Cook's prize conker.
Melissa's Mommy 1× in 1 column
Addressed in one of the party notes.
Melody Barrow 1× in 1 column
Telephoned to say she had found the dog, having seen the advertisement.
Michael Dokes 10× in 1 column
The boxer Gerrie Coetzee fought, in the Big Fight they got up on a Saturday morning for.
Michael Hall 2× in 2 columns
Neighbour. Nicky would not deprive him of his lifeline.
Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·Trapped with a teenage daughter
Mighty Emperor 1× in 1 column
Addressed by the slaves in the toga scene, who were very polite.
Mike Milton 1× in 1 column
Wrote the report on smuggled animals that set off the search for an alien in the house.
Milly Josephine 1× in 1 column
The name proposed for the hyena once it turned out to be female.
Mingas 1× in 1 column
Singer, the last name in the Cape Town line-up, where she is called Mozambiquan Mingas.
Miriam Makeba 2× in 2 columns
Singer. On stage in person, and she calls her incomparable and an award winner of true class.
Next century will be good for women and my Maya·Life in Cape Town
Miriam Pasvol 2× in 1 column
Fellow prisoner in a car; mother of a newly-turned seventeen-year-old and owner of a little white Cortina.
Miss Brown 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Every mother has a cross to — bear some are heavier than others
Miss Crumpet 1× in 1 column
Her own English teacher, who kept the class awake with a ruler while reciting Shakespeare in a double-bass monotone.
Miss Glover 7× in 3 columns
Teacher, who wanted three books covered by today. Set both Miss and Mrs in the same column.
Mothers of the world unite·The bean trail rides again·Who invented the fork anyway?
Miss Lil Walker 1× in 1 column
The name on the envelope of the Valentine card, which was not Carol's.
Miss Peach Complexion 1× in 1 column
What she had been just a few years back, and hard to believe.
Miss Snodthorpe 1× in 1 column
Caller from the Cruelty to Dumb Creatures League in the garden pest story.
Miss Woodhouse 3× in 1 column
Of Rosebank School, who phoned about what Barry had brought in.
Miss Zartz 1× in 1 column
A teacher, getting married at the end of the year.
Misses Mopps 1× in 1 column
Twenty of them would still take the better part of a week.
Momma Herself 1× in 1 column
Who she thought she was speaking to on the mountain, and it was Olivier her ski instructor.
Mona 14× in 4 columns
Friend of Carol's mother-in-law, told at the wedding that she was not losing a son but getting a bargain.
Life is just a set of false teeth·Sometimes, the bald truth hurts more than anything·Help! help! I’m a prisoner in a body·Making a mother out of Leonardo
Mona Hornby 5× in 1 column
Supermum, who caught her eye that week and swam an international triathlon in Hawaii.
Monde Mbomlambe 12× in 1 column
Employed as a Father Christmas in a shopping centre in December 1999, and taken on permanently two days before Christmas.
Morris Meyerowitz 10× in 1 column
Butcher whose boerewors is credited with helping people stop smoking.
Mr Barker 3× in 3 columns
The teacher told that Carol was an original, who advised getting a trade-in who could bake.
Who hates Gertrude Ginkel?·Mothers of the world unite for you have only brown paper to lose·Motherhood — it’s a great big crying rip-off
Mr Buthelezi 2× in 1 column
Taught Zulu ("Learn Zulu from a Prince"), and no relation to the chief.
Mr Caithness 5× in 4 columns
Neighbour. Built the 3 m fence to keep Henry the Hog off his gentle spaniel, and his garden blooms.
Oh death where is thy sting?·Gerrie for Prime Minister·Gardening tips stink·It’s not junk, it’s our history
Mr Cohen 2× in 1 column
The rat catcher. Prescribed pawpaw soaked in vodka, then left for Oyster Bay.
Mr Daniel 1× in 1 column
Who arranged a Currie Cup final screening in England.
Mr Gershon Clint Gottschalk 1× in 1 column
Recently deceased when the lawnmower was bought from him, and the lawnmower took his name.
Mr Guppy 3× in 1 column
The neighbour not spoken to for five years, since the cat chased his two Great Danes up a tree. Left down the road arm in arm with her husband.
Mr Lambert 3× in 2 columns
One of the four voices speaking at once.
Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria·Motherhood — it’s a great big crying rip-off
Mr Lazar 1× in 1 column
Her husband, as the switchboard announces him: will you take a call from Mr Lazar?
Mr Molefe 3× in 1 column
Taught Speedy Sesotho by classified advertisement.
Mr Nightjammer 1× in 1 column
The postman, who brought a summons.
Mr Rafter 1× in 1 column
The roof repairman, away for the Christmas vacation.
Mr Tannenboim 8× in 1 column
A small wiry man of the Polish resistance and a champion boxer, who taught the girls of the youth club to punch.
Mr Williams 3× in 1 column
Who asked whether Lazar is a French name, and was told it is a Jewish Hungarian one.
Mrs Anderson 3× in 1 column
The school secretary, solicitous about whether Mrs Lazar was alright.
Mrs Appelgrun 1× in 1 column
Neighbour whose patch was cut with nail scissors when Gottschalk would not start.
Mrs Betty-in-charge-of-catering 1× in 1 column
Named that way in Rochi's voice, over what to serve.
Mrs Birt 1× in 1 column
At the school: which child would you like today?
Mrs Glover 6× in 3 columns
Nicky's teacher, who taught that God is a woman and earned a box of liqueur chocolates for it.
Mothers of the world unite·The bean trail rides again·Who invented the fork anyway?
Mrs Hauptfleish 2× in 1 column
Teacher, who wanted four more covered immediately.
Mrs Hodges 1× in 1 column
Henrico's mother, who invited Barry to a Riotous Razzle with champagne, caviar blinis and a strip show.
Mrs Kornball 1× in 1 column
Gave Betty a low mark for the project on fat bats.
Mrs Mabonela 1× in 1 column
Named by her mother-in-law in place of Mrs van der Merwe.
Mrs Robertson 2× in 1 column
Whose daughter picked up a little Maltese-type dog in Rosebank. It was not Candy.
Mrs Smit 1× in 1 column
Swimming coach at Barry's school. Rob wanted to know what class she was in.
Mrs Trottelthwaite 1× in 1 column
The neighbour Carol is mistaken for at her own front door.
Mrs Wade 1× in 1 column
Let them the cottage on Lookout Beach, next to the carpark, jacuzzi in the garden.
Mrs Watling 4× in 2 columns
Nicky's teacher, and the judge of the lopsided mammoth.
Mrs Weston 1× in 1 column
Whose husband bought her Fortnum and Masons for her birthday.
Muhammad Ali 2× in 2 columns
Invoked for the build of the woman demonstrating meatless sausage near the cold meat.
Dead fish don't talk back·Only a mug thinks crime is confined to Gauteng
Music King 1× in 1 column
The man from Uitenhage, who has over 200 tapes.
Myrtle Crumb 2× in 1 column
Wrote to thank her for finding Melissa's orthodontic mouthpiece in a school dustbin at midnight.
Myrtle Hogg 6× in 3 columns
Book club member. Recommends an affair for every middle-aged drudge; had her own face pulled up to the top of her head.
A toothy tale about headgear·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Forgive my yawn as the cliché-crunchers take over
Naas Botha 7× in 6 columns
Rugby player. Horace the hamster was reported nibbling his right boot at Loftus Versfeld.
The sad demise of Horace·A ball by any other game·The Wedding causes civil war·Men's lib could start with a little chiffon·'Crazee' that a lack of a 'kick hair' lost us Test·Die Bleddy Boom
Nancy Mitford 3× in 2 columns
Invoked, and turning in her grave, over a table napkin used as a cloth.
Who invented the fork anyway?·When life is just a bowl of kumquats
Nat Nakasa 1× in 1 column
Writer, named first among those she says the country produced and asks readers to go back and read.
Nelson Mandela 59× in 23 columns
Released in February 1990 after 27 years. A recurring presence in the later columns.
It’s enough to make you ask what’s in a name·In the thick of the brown·Democracy is a fragile plant·Let’s dress men up for a long life·Adverts' slogans power up our New South Africa·Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·Oh woe is me, now that the builders have all departed·Planet America is a wonder to behold·Cold feet search nightly for a pair of warm thighs·Touts at robots help usher in new SA·Sunbeams of happiness – not only for pigeons·My private insights into Winnie and Anneline·Naturally, Prince Charles and I talked hydrangeas·Husband or jacuzzi? Is there a real choice?·Aerobics, like bungee jumping, is strictly for lunatics·Hearing reflects horrors but also a chance for hope·Putting on a charitable face for the season·The only time I've been speechless is on a plane·Hotstuff Lazar cc will take a wait off your mind·A mal jol in the mall to mark millennium’s end·Nisson Mandra·Putting old ties where your ‘tush’ is·Life in Cape Town
Newton Kanhema 7× in 2 columns
A journalist friend, "known for his irreverence about most things".
Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·Politically correct language
Nic 7× in 1 column
The electrician who came when Pete, Ted and Fred would not, rewired the house for R4 000 and then moved in.
Nicci Shulman 3× in 2 columns
Named in the column.
So who did what to whom in Plet?·Facing up to the bare facts of rhythm in the old genes
Nicky 315× in 127 columns
Daughter. Landed the two-kilo tiger fish on salami and cucumber.
The toothmouse strikes again·Property tycoon trauma·Sardines in the sand·A louse in time saves nine·Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Who hates Gertrude Ginkel?·Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·In the swim of things·Every mother deserves one·Uncle Walter in long-Johns·So who said parties are such fun?·Happy Father's Day to you·A little flu goes a long way·The knock-kneed protege·The bean trail rides again·Who invented the fork anyway?·So who's afraid of crocs?·Frostbite can be fun·Eat your heart out Margot·Mothers of the world unite for you have only brown paper to lose·Strike of the unpaid domestic engineers·When a scone means failure or success·Holidays hardly happen·Mammoth mother strikes again·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·It's toothmouse time and the gold price is up·Hark, the Jewish angel sings·The night we saw the Pope and the peppermints tasted funny·Things aren’t what they used to be – or what they should be for that matter·Meet my daughter the plant monitor·When death is a welcome release·So who needs to speak English these days?·So who did what to whom in Plet?·Drink champagne and do your bit for South Africa·The banana loaf mother strikes back·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·Facing up to the bare facts of rhythm in the old genes·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·Every mother has a cross to — bear some are heavier than others·I guess other mothers have trees too ...·Fins ain’t what they used to be·Gerrie for Prime Minister·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria·Help! help! I’m a prisoner in a body·They call it high-flying living·Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen·So who needs romance on St Valentine's Day?·A tragic tale·My daughter the fish·Raindrops keep falling on my head·A little drama in life goes a long way·A murderer or saint?·The day Walter curled up and died at Satara·Every mother should have her day·King Alfred never made a mountain out of a cupcake·Let it all hang out·Every mother needs a thief in her life·She’s just a talking skunk·Happiness is when your son has a date for the matric dance·It’s spring and sex is in the air·Oh ring where is thy ding a ling a ling?·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·Poor Dubowitz bites the dust·Never mind the lumps in the jam — it’s the thought that counts·So, who needs to Loop a Star?·For the father who has everything·Exams are hell on the cells·A kiss is just a kiss·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·Who's hanging up on life?·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Gardening tips stink·Life's a bowl of olives·Uteri for hire·Who's having a ball?·Help! I've got a teenage daughter·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·It could probably happen to anyone·Naked is nice . . . so they say·The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style·Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·On the slippery slope to fame·Braving the depths of life in a wetsuit·I'm the Queen of the crumbling castle·Trapped with a teenage daughter·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·Say a swift Howzit! on your teledivellicater·Stubby’s farewell a pulverised garden·Birthday greetings ‘Kos’ a fortune·Die rubriek is ook in Afrikaans beskikbaar ...·Flushed with success in toiletry trade·Raisins are tasty, but children are more filling·Sons, daughters, decisions and dual standards·Snappy hint for canine canines·I’m loo-sing out on the new SA·Blame it all on spinach·Who says it’s just a game?·It’s enough to make you ask what’s in a name·It’s not junk, it’s our history·In the thick of the brown·The day my daughter turned into a swan·So, what's a lion or two?·Parenthood’s prosaic myths·Heaven is ... a heedful dog·Boris was Hugo looking for love·Matric blues and a new era·Some dags cakked under the strine·Naked truth of saying goodbye·Beware my little fender bender·The dread K53 drives you mad·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·Why didn’t I do this all before?·The day the grapevine broke down·Born to shop – in Istanbul Grand Bazaar·Clutch gets into high gear·Romance sparkles – and dims·Cricket, mealies and joy of being mother-in-law-to-be·The break up of Spice Girls may have sunk our rand·Maya is Born·Well hello, Maya, it's nice to know you're here at last·The Generation Gap·Listen up Mallett! My old mom has some ideas·A mal jol in the mall to mark millennium’s end·WTC Attack
Nicola 7× in 3 columns
What she calls the person she is talking to, she says, always.
It's a perfectly opposite life·The day my daughter turned into a swan·Hellish end to life for an unknown teenager
Nigel Mandy 1× in 1 column
Storeman and keeper of tents in the same roll call.
Nigel Mansell 1× in 1 column
Formula One driver. The home-made version parks niftily, missing Henry the Hog by one centimetre.
Niki Lauda 2× in 2 columns
Named in the column.
Watchit! Here comes Niki Lauda Lazar!·Every mother should have a Jody Scheckter in her life
Noo-Noo 6× in 1 column
What Maya calls her, yelled while holding her in a stranglehold, in place of ouma or grandma.
Old Abraham 6× in 1 column
Fixed the Medem's gutter pipings in 1967 and remembered it at Christmas.
Olivia Newton-John 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Olivier 2× in 1 column
The ski instructor at Tignes, mistaken for God from underneath.
Ollie le Roux 1× in 1 column
Rugby player, named with Rassie Erasmus among Johanna's favourites.
Otello Marcato 1× in 1 column
Pasta maker and inventor, who designed the original Marcato machine in 1941.
Otto Krause 1× in 1 column
South African journalist and editor.
Ouma Hettie 2× in 2 columns
Named in the column.
Facing up to the bare facts of rhythm in the old genes·How not to get into a stew
Ouma Kakevanea van Wyk 1× in 1 column
Neighbour. Her backyard, and the khakibos field next door, went on the lawnmowing round.
P W Botha 10× in 9 columns
Prime Minister from 1978 and State President from 1984. She wonders how she can expect him to make a go of things when she cannot keep her own house in order.
When boerewors is the bane of life·C’mon – it’s nearly Christmas, let’s have another swinging party·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·If food be the music of love, eat on·Who says every mom has to suffer? The traffic department·Boerewors is the bane of my life·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·Men's lib could start with a little chiffon·Fattening and flexing in the great flab war
Paganini 3× in 1 column
Violin concertos played in the lavatory, the only haven in a house of competing music.
Pascual 5× in 5 columns
Named in a list of status dinner guests.
Revolution of the fig leaf generation·A little bit of status gets you nowhere·C’mon – it’s nearly Christmas, let’s have another swinging party·So who needs to speak English these days?·Happiness is when your son has a date for the matric dance
Pat 11× in 4 columns
Who will give them the material and a picture for the sailor suit.
Eat your heart out Margot·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·Uteri for hire·An election of a different kind
Pat Anthony 1× in 1 column
The South African woman who carried her daughter's triplets; the book club's precedent.
Paul Beresford 6× in 1 column
702 broadcaster whose helicopter traffic-report flight Carol joined.
Paul Ndlovu 1× in 1 column
Assistant maitre d’ preparing dishes at the Valentine’s dinner.
Paul Newman 3× in 2 columns
"You don't have to look like Paul Newman to make good."
Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·Momma is marooned on an island paradise
Paulette 2× in 1 column
One of the children in the same lift scheme.
Peter Magubane 1× in 1 column
Photographer. He went with Carol to Soweto to interview Winnie Mandela.
Peter Marais 5× in 1 column
Mayor of Cape Town in 2001, and the subject of the street-renaming farce.
Peter Soldatos 3× in 3 columns
Named, with Greta Abrahamson, as the sort of person for whom dressmaking instructions are simple enough.
Eat your heart out Margot·Flying high in hospital·I guess other mothers have trees too ...
Peter Wilhelm 1× in 1 column
Columnist, first in the list of writers she calls a feast of wit.
Peter Winslow 2× in 1 column
Who Jamie was playing with somewhere far away, leaving her alone.
Phineas 5× in 3 columns
The showroom attendant who put on a crash helmet before parking Carol's car.
Life is just a tube of toothpaste·A book, a bough, a glass of wine and that’s it·Flying high in hospital
Piet 17× in 5 columns
Down the road. The authority behind the chicken manure, the digging up of it and the pig urine.
Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·Who said life was just one big hoot?·Gardening tips stink·If the cap fits, steal it·When you croodle, you’ve moved beyond cuddling
Piet Koornhof 3× in 2 columns
Named in the same line.
Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·When you croodle, you’ve moved beyond cuddling
Piet-the-panelbeater 17× in 5 columns
Had a hubcap knocking around, for a bottle of whiskey and a big kiss.
Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·Who said life was just one big hoot?·Gardening tips stink·If the cap fits, steal it·When you croodle, you’ve moved beyond cuddling
Pieter Dirk Uys 3× in 1 column
Satirist. She calls him our country's most brilliant, in person or as his alter ego, and says he knocks every sacred cow.
Pietro Marcato 1× in 1 column
Stood beside the pasta machine at the Cape Town Good Food & Wine Show; son of Otello Marcato, who designed the original in 1941.
Pik Botha 9× in 9 columns
Foreign minister from 1977; the benchmark for a difficult temperament, and made to look good-natured by a cat.
Flush your worries away — ask the kids·What a life ... it shouldn't happen to anyone·Every mother needs a book club·When the phantom bomber tries to strike·Is man really necessary?·Full marks for matric tact and tactics·We've been harbouring a friendly alien·I'm the Queen of the crumbling castle·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking
Prince Charles 14× in 7 columns
Held, on the question of whether trees feel, to be wrong.
Of plague ... and things·The Wedding causes civil war·A smack on the kisser for the New South Africa·Cutting down trees isn't the only way to calm down·Naturally, Prince Charles and I talked hydrangeas·CD-Roms way beyond the ken of anyone over 4·Not out of my tree, just the opposite
Prince Charming 1× in 1 column
Who she has dreamt about for years, and who owns an island.
Prince Philip 1× in 1 column
Invoked, with Donna Wurzel, for knowing what it is to be stared at.
Prince Snoring 1× in 1 column
Her husband, who grunted and rolled over when she screeched about terrorists.
Princess Diana 11× in 4 columns
One of the three the mother-in-law thought her son could have had instead.
The Wedding causes civil war·It's a perfectly opposite life·A smack on the kisser for the New South Africa·Queen of the World mourned, even on Cape Flats
Rainer Scholz 1× in 1 column
Family friend at St Francis Bay, who did the drive in thirteen hours.
Ralph 229× in 102 columns
Son. Second of the four; blew in from London in 1988 in the remnants of Petticoat Lane.
The toothmouse strikes again·Oh death where is thy sting?·Flush your worries away — ask the kids·Property tycoon trauma·Cast off the gherkins·A louse in time saves nine·Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Who hates Gertrude Ginkel?·Who said Valentines were soppy?·Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·Every mother deserves one·The sad demise of Horace·Uncle Walter in long-Johns·So who said parties are such fun?·Happy Father's Day to you·When boerewors is the bane of life·Culture vulture·Some people even sew for fun·A ball by any other game·So who invented New Year?·Who invented the fork anyway?·There's a blight in my bath·Cast off your school uniforms·Strike of the unpaid domestic engineers·When a scone means failure or success·Revolution of the fig leaf generation·Roll out the pastry, your country needs you.·Who says it's a dog's life?·Sex is here to stay·The night we saw the Pope and the peppermints tasted funny·Things aren’t what they used to be – or what they should be for that matter·When death is a welcome release·There’s nothing quite like drowning to keep you fit·So who needs to speak English these days?·When parents and teachers meet — life’s always exciting·Drink champagne and do your bit for South Africa·Oh death where is thy sting?·The diningroom table’s the backbone of the family: Help! We’ve just collapsed·Needed now — inflatable mum for deflated dad·Never give up in a tight spot·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·C’mon, plug into a whole new way of life·Every mother has a cross to — bear some are heavier than others·Gerrie for Prime Minister·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria·Help! help! I’m a prisoner in a body·Help, help, there’s a hell’s angel trying to get out·Motherhood — it’s a great big crying rip-off·Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen·A fishy tale with a bite·Scuba divers do it deeper·When jogging goes to Carol’s head·So who needs romance on St Valentine's Day?·Raindrops keep falling on my head·A little drama in life goes a long way·A murderer or saint?·Every mother should have her day·King Alfred never made a mountain out of a cupcake·Let it all hang out·How not to get into a stew·Every dog should have his day·Life is just a bar of wormy chocolate·Who said running is fun?·There’s nothing quite like camping·Every back should have its day ... or seven·Happiness is when your son has a date for the matric dance·It’s spring and sex is in the air·Oh ring where is thy ding a ling a ling?·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·Poor Dubowitz bites the dust·Never mind the lumps in the jam — it’s the thought that counts·Meet my son the rock star·For the father who has everything·Every mother needs a full stomach in her life·Who's hanging up on life?·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·It could probably happen to anyone·Clothes to rend the family apart·Full marks for matric tact and tactics·On the slippery slope to fame·Braving the depths of life in a wetsuit·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·Birthday greetings ‘Kos’ a fortune·Ag shame for a world which is oh so deprived·Raisins are tasty, but children are more filling·Fattening and flexing in the great flab war·It’s not junk, it’s our history·So, what's a lion or two?·Matric blues and a new era·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·Why didn’t I do this all before?·The day the grapevine broke down·To sleep perchance to dream·The multitudes left us mauled, bruised – and grateful·Cricket, mealies and joy of being mother-in-law-to-be·It's so easy to adapt to life in an island paradise·Maya is Born·Well hello, Maya, it's nice to know you're here at last·Three down and only one to go ...·The Parrot
Raquel Welch 6× in 6 columns
The desired silhouette.
Sometimes, the bald truth hurts more than anything·Bite the dust baby, cos here I come·Every fried egg will have its day·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·It's a perfectly opposite life·Needed now — inflatable mum for deflated dad
Riaan Eksteen 1× in 1 column
Had lately left the SABC, sadly albeit not penuriously.
Richard 17× in 12 columns
On the log in the middle of the river with Warwick.
In the swim of things·In the bush with the terrors·Oh death where is thy sting?·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·I guess other mothers have trees too ...·Momma is marooned on an island paradise·The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·Able housekeepers and admirable ‘romantic’ tactics·Nisson Mandra·Politically correct language
Richard Burton 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Richard Gere 1× in 1 column
Spelt Richard Geer in the column.
Richard Robinson 1× in 1 column
A manager, on record about the breakfast.
Richard Smith 1× in 1 column
Cartoonist, listed among South African talents who made us laugh.
Richard Stevens 6× in 4 columns
On guard with Michael Hall and Simon Heuberger.
Oh death where is thy sting?·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·I guess other mothers have trees too ...·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking
Rico Schacherl 1× in 1 column
With Harry Dugmore and Stephen Francis, created Madam & Eve in 1992.
Rip van Winkle 18× in 15 columns
Her husband, in a striped unisex something, and the only midget motor mechanic in the business.
Every mother deserves one·Uncle Walter in long-Johns·Gone fishin' ... or something·Life’s just an old spark plug anyway ...·Motherhood — it’s a great big crying rip-off·Every mother should have her day·Every dog should have his day·Bye-bye smelly, lovable, comical canine·Everyone trying to be someone else on Cape beaches·When a syringa twig does the job better, use it...·The Generation Gap·My ‘ubuntu braai’ idea sadly went down in flames·Hello! Give a thought for the desperate·Going the full Monty in hair dyes·Mr Tannenboim
Rob 22× in 18 columns
Carol's husband, named as Rob in the columns and in full as Rob Lazar when he wins the best-dressed-pyjama prize in "The silk sheet syndrome"; Robin in the 1987 newspaper announcement of a son and a phone; elsewhere "my spouse", "the man in my life", latterly the Renaissance Man.
Parties in the sticks·Sardines in the sand·Uncle Walter in long-Johns·So who said parties are such fun?·Sad lament of a dried-out drudge·There's nothing like a good chew·The silk sheet syndrome·C’mon, plug into a whole new way of life·When jogging goes to Carol’s head·A little drama in life goes a long way·How not to get into a stew·Who said running is fun?·Who's hanging up on life?·The sweet smell of sexcess·Listen up Mallett! My old mom has some ideas·Just how did we survive with only soap and water?·Don’t crunch, rather munch pesky snails·Animal behaviour consultant
Robbie 3× in 3 columns
One of four who cut a foot at the picnic.
So who said parties are such fun?·In the bush with the terrors·Taking a bath with the neighbours saves water
Robert 17× in 15 columns
A trout fisherman supreme, in the roll of other people's gifted children.
Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Who said Valentines were soppy?·Naughty, naked and oh so nice·Blame it on Mr Bell·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·It's a perfectly opposite life·A skeleton out of the cupboard·Oh death where is thy sting?·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria·A murderer or saint?·Happiness is when your son has a date for the matric dance·Momma is marooned on an island paradise·Business trips are hell·Politically correct language·Life in Cape Town
Robert Kirby 2× in 2 columns
Satirist. Caviar through a wide straw.
Who said Valentines were soppy?·Politically correct language
Robert Mugabe 2× in 2 columns
Should be re-deployed, she writes, but not elephants.
Robert Redford 6× in 5 columns
The measure of a good-looking man. A jovial young schoolmaster made him look like a kipper.
Naughty, naked and oh so nice·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·It's a perfectly opposite life·A skeleton out of the cupboard·Come and have a wild experience in Pretoria
Rochi Boss 1× in 1 column
Rang round the swimming mothers asking them to bake for the interschools.
Rod Stewart 4× in 2 columns
A hairdo that made her look like him in drag.
Flying high in hospital·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?
Ronald Reagan 2× in 2 columns
Credited, with Shakespeare, for the line about the means and the end.
Memories are made of evenings like this·I'm the Queen of the crumbling castle
Ros Finn 6× in 2 columns
Works for Cruise Lines, and introduced herself knowing it was a strange way to begin.
Hey! Watchit Greek islands — here comes Momma Lazar!·Momma is marooned on an island paradise
Rudolf Nureyev 2× in 2 columns
The dancer, invoked for the census enumerator coming up the driveway.
Common census bites the dust·An election of a different kind
Ryan O'Neal 1× in 1 column
Film actor. His double makes a pass at you at a party and you tell him you have backache.
Saddam Hussein 2× in 1 column
"A pimple in an acne patch," per a Jerusalem chamber maid, January 1991.
Saint Hymie 1× in 1 column
Who she said a silent prayer to before pushing her chin out.
Sally 7× in 2 columns
One of the children in the school lift scheme, 323km a week.
Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·Able housekeepers and admirable ‘romantic’ tactics
Salmon Rushdie 1× in 1 column
Printed thus. The bookclub was working out who would drive to Swaziland for the book.
Sam Mirwis 10× in 3 columns
Sports editor and marathon runner who proposed a Sunday Express fun-run team.
Who said running is fun?·Empty schools are an instant education solution·Not out of my tree, just the opposite
Samantha Gilliwell 2× in 1 column
Small ballerina, caught on the nose by an enthusiastic wave from the wings.
Samantha Robinson 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Sammy Stoveman 2× in 1 column
The stove repair man, who took the innards away and answered from Plettenberg Bay.
Sandra van der Merwe 1× in 1 column
Cited as an example of a woman who went out and got a new image.
Sandy Brink 1× in 1 column
Rosebank School caller reporting the escape of Jamie’s ducks.
Santa Claus 2× in 2 columns
Let him enjoy Santa Claus, and when he is 21 he will know.
Sarah Bernhardt 3× in 3 columns
Named in the column.
Facing up to the bare facts of rhythm in the old genes·Poor Dubowitz bites the dust·Born to shop – in Istanbul Grand Bazaar
Sarieta Poggenpoel 1× in 1 column
Not at the other end of the phone at four in the morning.
Schuyler S Wheeler 4× in 1 column
Patented the electric fan. Blamed by Nic the electrician for everything that went wrong in one week.
Shakespeare 5× in 5 columns
At the kitchen sink, in the same list.
What goes thump in the dark?·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·I'm the Queen of the crumbling castle·Forgive my yawn as the cliché-crunchers take over·Mr Tannenboim
Sharon Coetzee 1× in 1 column
Model. Sat at the table in white with a huge flower in her hair.
Sherpa Tensing 1× in 1 column
Printed thus, for Tenzing Norgay. The company Carol kept at the foot of La Grand Motte.
Sheryl 4× in 4 columns
One of the three daughters-in-law imagined in the same line.
Birthday greetings ‘Kos’ a fortune·Raisins are tasty, but children are more filling·Thermal pants his bottom line·So, what's a lion or two?
Shulman 13× in 6 columns
Carol's maiden name; the small Stellenbosch cemetery is full of them.
So who did what to whom in Plet?·Facing up to the bare facts of rhythm in the old genes·So who needs Disney World when we’ve got the Rand Show?·What every good wife should know - or how to have a happy marriage·Vinning is vot counts, and our Boks did so in style·Die Bleddy Boom
Simon 6× in 6 columns
One of the boys wanting a lift home.
Heaven help me·So who said parties are such fun?·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·We're all going on a cosy holiday·So, what's a lion or two?·Adverts' slogans power up our New South Africa
Simon Heuberger 1× in 1 column
On guard with them.
Simon Tshabalala 1× in 1 column
Moulded the chassis in the advertisement.
Sir Edmund Hillary 2× in 2 columns
Placed his big left toe on the peak of Everest.
The day I received advice from above·Cold feet search nightly for a pair of warm thighs
Sir Galahad 2× in 1 column
In a blue wind cheater, holding out his hand.
Soggot 2× in 1 column
The chimney sweep called out on Christmas morning; two hours of shoving got nowhere and the firemen took the chimney apart.
Sol Kerzner 4× in 4 columns
Hotel and casino magnate. Shouted for president from the back of the queue.
Fasten your helmets and your false teeth·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·My private insights into Winnie and Anneline
Sol Kerzner 9× in 7 columns
Hotel and casino man. His split from Anneline was the newspapers' story that week and the book club's main topic.
So who said parties are such fun?·Fasten your helmets and your false teeth·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·So who needs Rod Stewart and a flashy old diamond?·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·My private insights into Winnie and Anneline
Sophia 2× in 2 columns
The woman Carol's husband might have married, according to his mother; she made passionate pasta.
Sophie 5× in 3 columns
Lucky Sophie, whose husband bought her something.
Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·Turning red after being in the pink·Life in Cape Town
Spencer Tracy 1× in 1 column
His answer when she asked who he thought he was.
Spero Villioti 2× in 1 column
Designer whose collection was shown at the ball. The page spells him both Villioti and Vallioti.
Spike Milligan 2× in 2 columns
The reading taken into the designer lavatory.
When a country hick takes on the USA·It could probably happen to anyone
Stefanus van der Merwe 1× in 1 column
A farmer in the same fantasy.
Stella 2× in 1 column
Friend who left Johannesburg for Margate and writes to say she misses it.
Stephen Francis 1× in 1 column
With Harry Dugmore and Rico Schacherl, created Madam & Eve in 1992.
Stephen Grenfell 1× in 1 column
Alone on a desert island with 500 king-size oysters, in the same daydream.
Subramany Naidoo 1× in 1 column
Adjusted the headlight in the advertisement.
Sue Garbett 1× in 1 column
Women's page editor, who disappeared beneath her sheets when a noise came out of the bush at Rundu.
Swifty 14× in 1 column
Nicky's suggestion when a name was wanted. "Mummy, why don't you ask Swifty. He's so nice."
Sylvester Stallone 1× in 1 column
"Now I know how Sylvester Stallone felt in Rocky."
Talia 1× in 1 column
Keeps monkeys. Jamie proposed borrowing one for Mother's Day.
Tannie Sannie 2× in 2 columns
Named in the column.
Telly Savalas 5× in 4 columns
American actor; the bald standard against which the author was measured.
Help! help! I’m a prisoner in a body·On a countdown to fall-out·Oh boy, mom remembered the blatjang·Naturally, Prince Charles and I talked hydrangeas
Terry Meyer 9× in 1 column
Her diving buddy, taken for a killer whale at first sight.
Tessa 2× in 2 columns
From Paris, named with Jean-Benoit and Chantal.
Beauty takes to the bush·Happiness is when your son has a date for the matric dance
Tex Perreira 1× in 1 column
Named for a bumper he smoothed.
Thabo Mbeki 4× in 4 columns
Became president after the April elections, the column records.
Forgive my yawn as the cliché-crunchers take over·A dose of reverse-Viagra might go down well·Not out of my tree, just the opposite·Nisson Mandra
the Cocklethwaites 5× in 1 column
Charlotte's family after she married, and the name she took.
the Ginkels 3× in 1 column
Gertrude Ginkel's family, who maintained that although a misfit in other ways, it had its points.
the Goldies 2× in 2 columns
Whose table supplied the bean sprouts and the lettuce leaf.
the Halls 9× in 8 columns
Down the road. They popped over quietly for a quick one, and their Siamese cats were terrorised from the roof.
Oh death where is thy sting?·A tragic tale·Matric’s killing me! I just can’t stand the strain!·Gardening tips stink·Trapped with a teenage daughter·Smiles grow stiff amidst all the goodwill·The rise and fall of a Jewish Santa·Taking a bath with the neighbours saves water
the Lindbergs 1× in 1 column
Hosts of the tasteful soiree for the Concerned Parents Against Precocious Cosmetics Committee.
the Rajaks 3× in 2 columns
Good friends, who sold their house without a board going up.
Property tycoon trauma·Fasten your helmets and your false teeth
Thomas 15× in 7 columns
Who has to be fetched and taken to the barber.
Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·Boerewors will overcome·Old age or not, 10 eggs per meal is murder·Some fishy tales of feminine prowess·Touts at robots help usher in new SA·Gearing up for my son's Caribbean splicing not easy·Not out of my tree, just the opposite
Thomas Drove 1× in 1 column
Correspondent from Cochabamba, Bolivia, writing to Morris the Butcher.
Thompson Mangela 3× in 2 columns
Arrived offering to restore the Lazar garden. The name is used again in 1991 for a miner whose feet are sterilised in the advertising fantasy.
Who says the grass is always greener on the other side ...?·Adverts' slogans power up our New South Africa
Thyra Gabriel 1× in 1 column
The pupil of great versatility and talent who reconstructed a sheep's skeleton and labelled it Elliot.
Timothy McVeigh 1× in 1 column
His execution was momentarily stayed while Maya watched butterflies hatching.
Tish 3× in 1 column
Asked in a whisper how Andrea's matric was going.
Titian 3× in 3 columns
The painter, invoked by a hairdresser for the colour he proposed to turn her hair.
Sardines in the sand·When hair should never happen·Naked truth of saying goodbye
Toby 3× in 1 column
One of the children in the same lift scheme.
Toko Hlatshwayo 28× in 9 columns
House painter. "Whites say Clutch-why-oh." Promised a masterpiece and delivered a hole in the lounge wall.
Supermother rides again·Meet my daughter the plant monitor·Watchit! Here comes Niki Lauda Lazar!·Beware my little fender bender·The dread K53 drives you mad·Clutch gets into high gear·Guns & Mobile Phones·Full feed ahead with the Jewish mother syndrome·Lazar of Arabia, and the groin pain was worth it
Tom Leary 1× in 1 column
Who she fantasised and tripped with, in the account of her own younger self.
Tony 8× in 7 columns
Family friend, and a man of superb reputation with the scalpel.
In the bush with the terrors·It shouldn't happen to anyone·When the stay-fit freak strikes again·Burning rubber in the bushes·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·We have our counterparts in the animal kingdom·Forgive my yawn as the cliché-crunchers take over
Tony Versfeld 1× in 1 column
General Tyres tyre division chief executive at the bush demonstration.
Tops 6× in 3 columns
An informal hubcap dealer, who said he would be able to arrange one.
Help! I've got a teenage daughter·Hell hath no fury like those irritated by cellphones·Where do missing hubcaps go?
Totius Claudius 6× in 1 column
Invented Roman emperor, credited with decreeing the toga and so, eventually, the school uniform.
Trudy Shulman 3× in 3 columns
Carol's mother. In her late eighties, still driving, and a fierce judge of Springbok rugby.
Uncle Walter in long-Johns·Vinning is vot counts, and our Boks did so in style·Die Bleddy Boom
Typewriter 6× in 2 columns
Clutch's assistant. Nodded sagely at damp.
Uncle Abie 1× in 1 column
The grandmother's example of who Father Christmas turns out to be when you are 21, in a red dressing gown.
Uncle Arthur 2× in 1 column
Excused from the family Christmas lunch, being in the Alps birdwatching with a divorcee met at the Warmbaths Spa.
Uncle Boet 1× in 1 column
The relative Rob told he thought two 18-year-olds in place of Ma would be fun.
Uncle Fred 1× in 1 column
The hookah is for him, in the Christmas round.
Uncle Walter 30× in 4 columns
A somewhat distant relative who arrived at 7am in what looked like long-Johns, stayed three weeks and turned out to belong to neither of them.
Uncle Walter in long-Johns·Culture vulture·The day Walter curled up and died at Satara·There are absolutely no flies on the Elixir of Life
Van Gogh 3× in 3 columns
The Rajaks' Van Gogh wallhanging, borrowed to cover the burping geyser.
Property tycoon trauma·Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Beneficial roll of the dice in sleepy dorp
Vanessa 4× in 4 columns
Our little Vanessa, the only one dancing in time.
The knock-kneed protege·The bean trail rides again·Things aren’t what they used to be – or what they should be for that matter·Braving the depths of life in a wetsuit
Vaughn Wiles 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
Vic Cook 2× in 1 column
Aged seven, sent Carol her first valentine in exchange for a frog.
Viv Prince 2× in 1 column
Bureau chief on the press trip, who wanted a loo and later walked into a thornbush looking for her contact lenses.
Volker 5× in 2 columns
On the same holiday. Asked Barry whether she would cry when she said goodbye.
Never give up in a tight spot·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen
Walter Gehring 1× in 1 column
Of Basel University; the other half of the fruit fly team.
Warwick 11× in 5 columns
At the tenth birthday picnic: shooting the rapids on a log, then missing in action, found under a willow tree with the marshmallows.
In the bush with the terrors·Oh death where is thy sting?·Hamburgers still beat slow dancing when you’re a kid·Come the revolution·The day I exhibited distinct birding characteristics
Warwick Dawes 1× in 1 column
Named in the column.
White Hunter 1× in 1 column
Her husband, resplendent in his cut-off jeans.
Willie 5× in 4 columns
Hairdresser: long or short?
When boerewors is the bane of life·Oh death where is thy sting?·It’s spring and sex is in the air·So, who needs to Loop a Star?
Wim 6× in 3 columns
On the same holiday. Noticed the black smoke coming from the exhaust pipe.
Never give up in a tight spot·Fun in the sun — or when holidays happily happen·Who says it’s just a game?
Wing Sen 1× in 1 column
One of the three daughters-in-law her mother-in-law imagines, with Sheryl and Fatima.
Winnie Mandela 18× in 8 columns
Nelson Mandela's wife. Carol went to their Soweto home with Peter Magubane to interview her, and Madiba opened the door.
It’s enough to make you ask what’s in a name·In the thick of the brown·My private insights into Winnie and Anneline·Husband or jacuzzi? Is there a real choice?·Hearing reflects horrors but also a chance for hope·Putting on a charitable face for the season·Who could afford to live to the ripe age of 309?·Nisson Mandra
Winston Churchill 7× in 4 columns
Invoked for how a mother feels leaving Sandton City with three outsize tops and the briefest mini on the Continent.
Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Every mother needs a newspaper round in her life·Help! I've got a teenage daughter·A mal jol in the mall to mark millennium’s end
Woody Allen 19× in 10 columns
In the bedroom, in the household's reading list.
Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Naughty, naked and oh so nice·Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·Momma is marooned on an island paradise·The night sweet romance passed me by·The sweet smell of sexcess·A smack on the kisser for the New South Africa·Making ‘mincemeat’ of a potentially useful asset·Sea creature now sports a funky pair of spectacles·Going the full Monty in hair dyes
Xavier Fauche 1× in 1 column
Co-author of Le Baiser, the book about kissing discussed in the column.
Yvonne Chaka Chaka 2× in 2 columns
Singer. Also proposed for president in the referendum queue.
Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·Life in Cape Town
Zola Budd 13× in 1 column
The runner. Her mother-in-law wants to send her home-made chicken soup.
Zvi Pomagrin 1× in 1 column
El Al's manager for Southern Africa. Explained the 17-hour re-route.
Animals
The dogs, and one or two cows. They are family too, and they recur. Chief among them is Henry the Hog, who outranks every human in these columns except the children.
Angus 10× in 3 columns
A donkey, briefly the family transport to school, who spent a night chewing the playroom sofa.
Cast off the gherkins·Who says our animals don't have spiritual souls?·Ewe ... hayi ... and a few clicks are just the trick
Bentley 2× in 1 column
One of two puppies; mother a Maltese, father possibly a Scottie or a St Bernard.
Botha 29× in 23 columns
A goldfish. Swims on the piano with Mugabe and Golda Meir.
Flush your worries away — ask the kids·The sad demise of Horace·A ball by any other game·What a life ... it shouldn't happen to anyone·The Wedding causes civil war·C’mon – it’s nearly Christmas, let’s have another swinging party·Every mother needs a book club·I am a tree-trunk, Omo sofa·When the phantom bomber tries to strike·If food be the music of love, eat on·Who says every mom has to suffer? The traffic department·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·Men's lib could start with a little chiffon·Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·Is man really necessary?·Full marks for matric tact and tactics·We've been harbouring a friendly alien·I'm the Queen of the crumbling castle·Fattening and flexing in the great flab war·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·'Crazee' that a lack of a 'kick hair' lost us Test·Die Bleddy Boom
Candy 52× in 10 columns
The Maltese, far too tiny for six labrador puppies.
So who said parties are such fun?·It shouldn't happen to anyone·Culture vulture strikes again·Who says it's a dog's life?·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·Facing up to the bare facts of rhythm in the old genes·So who needs Disney World when we’ve got the Rand Show?·She’s just a talking skunk·Maltese poodles are intrepid South African settlers·I miss our fluffy little scrap of energy
Candy 52× in 10 columns
Small, white and fluffy, a snowball of a dog. Lost for three days in July 1982, found twice over, and thereafter reported as far afield as Oogies.
So who said parties are such fun?·It shouldn't happen to anyone·Culture vulture strikes again·Who says it's a dog's life?·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·Facing up to the bare facts of rhythm in the old genes·So who needs Disney World when we’ve got the Rand Show?·She’s just a talking skunk·Maltese poodles are intrepid South African settlers·I miss our fluffy little scrap of energy
Cape vulture 16× in 5 columns
Endangered bird of the Drakensberg and Magaliesberg cliffs; not, as it turned out, resident in Parkwood.
Heaven help me·Culture vulture·Oh death where is thy sting?·Surprise visit cleaned us out·No longer making a spectacle of myself
Cleopatra 13× in 5 columns
An Alsatian, whose contribution blocked the air filter of the millennium shelter.
Fins ain’t what they used to be·Oozing oil from every pore·It’s enough to make you ask what’s in a name·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·Holed up in my underground shelter
Clinton Friedman 14× in 5 columns
Jamie's goldfish. Went to Rhodes by train and very nearly on to the track at Johannesburg Station.
Braving the depths of life in a wetsuit·A versatile bowl fits two fish sandwiches·For whom the bell tolls: a hairy experience·In the thick of the brown·Who is this amazing cook and whiz with the vacuum?
Culture Vulture 7× in 2 columns
The bald-headed Indian Mynah taken for an endangered Cape vulture. Nests under the bedroom eaves and, his owners maintain, resembles Carol's husband.
Dumpling 18× in 8 columns
Erstwhile white Maltese, kept the pet parlour solvent until Carol shaved her bald and pink.
Mothers of the world unite for you have only brown paper to lose·Momma is marooned on an island paradise·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·Boris was Hugo looking for love·Taking a bath with the neighbours saves water·Maltese poodles are intrepid South African settlers·My ‘ubuntu braai’ idea sadly went down in flames·I miss our fluffy little scrap of energy
Fleebie 6× in 1 column
The Klongthorpes' chihuahua, squashed in the marital bed on the night the compromise was reached.
Fungus 10× in 2 columns
The Ginkels' dog, so named because although a misfit in looks, he grew on you. Squashed in the marital bed.
Boerewors is the bane of my life·Just how did we survive with only soap and water?
Gershon-the-goldfish 18× in 4 columns
The goldfish. Opened and shut his mouth silently through Carol's early night and had sadly passed away by morning.
Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·Boerewors is the bane of my life·There's a mini-millionaire in our backyard·Let’s dress men up for a long life
Golda Mayo 10× in 4 columns
A goldfish, flushed down the lavatory by mistake and recovered by the fire station.
Flush your worries away — ask the kids·Starkers in the grocery cupboard·Fins ain’t what they used to be·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot
Golda Meir 5× in 3 columns
A goldfish. Also, in "Starkers in the grocery cupboard" of 16 August 1981, the name of the family's pet chicken. Both are as printed.
Starkers in the grocery cupboard·Fins ain’t what they used to be·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot
Grandfather's Dinner 16× in 1 column
The turkey raised for her father's seventieth birthday, named by the children within ten minutes of arriving despite instructions. Ate rice crispies at the table, nipped the dogs, and attended the dinner as a guest.
Gravy Dog 1× in 1 column
Jason the Gravy Dog, who got the largest round of applause.
Harold Wilson 15× in 3 columns
A goldfish, glimpsed swimming side by side with Cleopatra.
Stimulate your sole·I guess other mothers have trees too ...·Fins ain’t what they used to be
Henry 224× in 41 columns
Small black hound, sold as a Scottie, closer to a miniature warthog. The recurring villain.
What goes thump in the dark?·Culture vulture strikes again·Who says it's a dog's life?·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·Henry the hog falls in love·I guess other mothers have trees too ...·Beauty takes to the bush·A tragic tale·Every dog should have his day·She’s just a talking skunk·It’s spring and sex is in the air·Business trips are hell·Gardening tips stink·Who says every mom has to suffer? The traffic department·So who needs a hog and a hyena in their lives?·Naked is nice . . . so they say·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·We've been harbouring a friendly alien·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·For whom the bell tolls: a hairy experience·Say a swift Howzit! on your teledivellicater·Smiles grow stiff amidst all the goodwill·Stubby’s farewell a pulverised garden·I'm not hogging it over the jet set·Snappy hint for canine canines·Blame it all on spinach·On a countdown to fall-out·So, what's a lion or two?·Surprise visit cleaned us out·Boris was Hugo looking for love·Bye-bye smelly, lovable, comical canine·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·Forget the pyramids – sex is the way to grow old·If only the ghost of old Hog would rise up and bite·Empty schools are an instant education solution·Who says our animals don't have spiritual souls?·Maltese poodles are intrepid South African settlers·Plumbing the depths to find the plumber inside me·Politically correct language·I miss our fluffy little scrap of energy·Supermarket shopping the new warfare
Henry 133× in 38 columns
One of Candy's four-legged companions, alongside Licquorice-the-labrador. Greeted her half-heartedly on her return.
What goes thump in the dark?·Culture vulture strikes again·Who says it's a dog's life?·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·Henry the hog falls in love·I guess other mothers have trees too ...·A tragic tale·Every dog should have his day·She’s just a talking skunk·It’s spring and sex is in the air·Business trips are hell·Gardening tips stink·Who says every mom has to suffer? The traffic department·So who needs a hog and a hyena in their lives?·Naked is nice . . . so they say·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·We've been harbouring a friendly alien·Devastating dialogue at the Dinner Drama·For whom the bell tolls: a hairy experience·Say a swift Howzit! on your teledivellicater·Smiles grow stiff amidst all the goodwill·Stubby’s farewell a pulverised garden·I'm not hogging it over the jet set·Snappy hint for canine canines·Blame it all on spinach·On a countdown to fall-out·So, what's a lion or two?·Surprise visit cleaned us out·Boris was Hugo looking for love·Bye-bye smelly, lovable, comical canine·Even in a bath shocks can be lurking·Forget the pyramids – sex is the way to grow old·If only the ghost of old Hog would rise up and bite·Who says our animals don't have spiritual souls?·Maltese poodles are intrepid South African settlers·Plumbing the depths to find the plumber inside me·Politically correct language·I miss our fluffy little scrap of energy
Herbert 13× in 7 columns
A rabbit. Not to be confused with Herbert Klongthorpe, who is a man.
A hysterectomy means never having to say no·Oh death where is thy sting?·Braais — or who burned the wors?·When boerewors is the bane of life·Every father deserves his day·British hack blasphemed noble ritual·My remote cellphone is confusing me
Horace 22× in 10 columns
The hamster. Hospitalised with tonsillitis and an acute otitis, brought home two days and R47 later, then vanished and was found dead in the filing cabinet over a copy of Playboy.
The sad demise of Horace·Frostbite can be fun·So who needs a dreamhouse?·The ice-cream cone syndrome of life·C’mon, plug into a whole new way of life·Come the revolution·Who says it’s just a game?·The "Joys" of Camping·Just keep the braai smoke off the TV screen·There's a great new way of meeting people in SA
Hymie-the-hamster 4× in 4 columns
A hamster who formed an alliance with Herbert; the result was found on Carol's pillow.
Oh death where is thy sting?·A book, a bough, a glass of wine and that’s it·Help! I've got a teenage daughter·Adverts' slogans power up our New South Africa
Ian Smiff 1× in 1 column
A handsome black fish with hooded eyes, introduced as a companion to Golda Mayo.
Indian Mynah 14× in 9 columns
Introduced starling, common in Johannesburg gardens. One bald specimen was mistaken for a Cape vulture.
The toothmouse strikes again·When stately homes crumble·Culture vulture·A Christmas tale·The bean trail rides again·Adultery, boredom, cold feet . . . take your pick·Every father deserves his day·Oh death where is thy sting?·Gardening tips stink
La Vache 1× in 1 column
The cow installed by a Paris salon to lick chic Parisienne heads.
Lady-the-dog 2× in 1 column
Along with Marilyn and Len, one of the party the dutiful parents took.
Liquorice 52× in 36 columns
The black labrador. Frolicked with the washing.
Jogging's for the birds·Braais — or who burned the wors?·Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·Common census bites the dust·Uncle Walter in long-Johns·Blame it all on Schuyler·So who said fat was fun?·So who invented New Year?·It shouldn't happen to anyone·So who needs a status symbol in their life? Me·Who invented the fork anyway?·Business is hell·Every father deserves his day·Make your ecosystem work·Starkers in the grocery cupboard·Eat your heart out Margot·The ice-cream cone syndrome of life·Mother's Day comes once a year — it's not enough·So who's got time to live these days?·Roll out the pastry, your country needs you.·Who says it's a dog's life?·Every dancer's mum shall have her day·They say pets are good for your health·Drink champagne and do your bit for South Africa·C’mon, plug into a whole new way of life·I guess other mothers have trees too ...·Gerrie for Prime Minister·Beauty is only skin deep — so who needs skin?·King Alfred never made a mountain out of a cupcake·Let it all hang out·She’s just a talking skunk·Who's hanging up on life?·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot
Mac 9× in 2 columns
The cat who, after so many years, decided he was a dog and stood in line for the Zoo Lake run.
Macaroni 23× in 11 columns
The cat whose impossible behaviour filled a column, and who turned out on the operating table to be the mother of six.
Bite the dust baby, cos here I come·What a life ... it shouldn't happen to anyone·The Liz Taylor of Parkwood·The silk sheet syndrome·It's toothmouse time and the gold price is up·Fins ain’t what they used to be·Gerrie for Prime Minister·A tragic tale·All about camels, cogs and turkeys and other things·If you haven’t stuffed cannelloni ... you really haven’t lived·There's a mini-millionaire in our backyard
Mahoney 37× in 7 columns
Rescued from a dustbin. A possible St Bernard, with the appetite and the looks of a dinosaur.
Every mutt has its day·So who needs a hog and a hyena in their lives?·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·Guru Spock moves over...·The ultimate civilised breakfast, SA style·Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·We have our counterparts in the animal kingdom
Motorcat 62× in 40 columns
Interred under the oak by 1988.
Heaven help me·Where have all the dumb kids gone?·Life is just a set of false teeth·Make your ecosystem work·So who says fresh air is healthy?·A toothy tale about headgear·Watchit! Here comes Niki Lauda Lazar!·Speed gets the adrenalin going·So who needs to speak English these days?·Life’s just an old spark plug anyway ...·Who said life was just one big hoot?·The day Walter curled up and died at Satara·It’s a cat’s life·Business trips are hell·Come the revolution·When life is just a bowl of kumquats·For the father who has everything·Hello Baryshnikov, my name's Carol·Life's a bowl of olives·Who says every mom has to suffer? The traffic department·Help! I've got a teenage daughter·Hooray, it's happy holidays again·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·Some fishy tales of feminine prowess·Get away from it all with a 7-year hitch·It’s not junk, it’s our history·Beware my little fender bender·The dread K53 drives you mad·Why didn’t I do this all before?·Pretoria hijackers have such a sense of humour·From Eau de Clone ... to the sweet smell of excess·Solly's shack shelters hope for all South Africans·Desperately seeking your ever-so-lost beloved car·It's so easy to adapt to life in an island paradise·New Year's Eve·They really don’t make things the way they used to·Sometimes good things do happen to good people·Buying a one way ticket to my dreams·Secondhand Norman storms along·My remote cellphone is confusing me
Mugabe 4× in 4 columns
A goldfish.
Business trips are hell·Come cast your vote for Carol's Commonwealth·Lay on jacuzzis for Fifi and Spot·Life in Cape Town
Natasha 7× in 3 columns
The other goldfish, and the better traveller of the two.
Ice-cream cone syndrome is incurable·Braving the depths of life in a wetsuit·A versatile bowl fits two fish sandwiches
Primrose 2× in 2 columns
The Jersey cow of Devon with restorative habits.
Rawhide-the-rat 1× in 1 column
Caught in a trap with blood on his nose, resuscitated at the vet, de-flead and moved into the cage Horace had just left.
Rodney 5× in 2 columns
The neighbour's hound, surprised at the dustbin at 3am and pursued with a tennis racket.
Every household drudge should have her day — but when?·A book, a bough, a glass of wine and that’s it
Stompie 7× in 2 columns
Johannes Nel's dog, who thinks he is a camel.
All about camels, cogs and turkeys and other things·Hearing reflects horrors but also a chance for hope
Wilton 6× in 1 column
Henry the Hog's love, so christened after his subsequent amorous behaviour.
Not yet sorted
Names the archive has found in the text but that have not been classified yet.
They are listed here so nothing is quietly lost; add them to data/entities.csv
to file them properly.
Abaringa3×
Absalom Mister Hardware1×
Academy Awards1×
Adriaan Vlok1×
Adrian Sutton3×
Afghanistan9×
Africa Rally1×
African Bush1×
African Christian Democratic Party1×
African Malteses1×
Afrikaner2×
Afrikaners4×
Agatha Crumpet1×
Agriculture3×
Air Seychelles2×
Aithe2×
Al Capone1×
Albert9×
Albertina Sisulu2×
Albertus Bosman's1×
Aldo4×
Aldo Berruti4×
Alexander Dubcek1×
Alexandra7×
Alfred Muller3×
Aliwal North1×
Allan Boesak1×
Alsatian5×
Alta Crawford1×
Alta Crawfords1×
Ameen2×
Ameen Akhalwaya1×
American Melissa1×
Amil Globu3×
Andes3×
Andre Joubert1×
Andrei Porchov1×
Andrew Taylor1×
Angelina5×
Angelina Zwane1×
Angelina's2×
Angelou4×
Anglo Boer War1×
Anglo’s Ogilvie Thompson1×
Angola2×
Animals2×
Annie Hall1×
Antjie Krog1×
ANTjie Samuel1×
Arabia3×
Arachnid Fund1×
Archbishop Desmond Tutu1×
Archbishop Tutu1×
Archie Lewis1×
Arkansas4×
Aromatherapy Palace4×
Arthur Calamaras1×
Arthur Goldman2×
Atlanta3×
Augustus2×
Auntie Lily1×
Aunty Leah1×
Aunty Lily3×
Aunty Lily's1×
Aunty Myrtle1×
Away4×
Baa4×
Bafana Bafana1×
Bafana Bafanailess World Cup1×
Baghdad Pact1×
Baked Bean1×
Balkans2×
Ban3×
Bantu2×
Bantu Holomisa1×
Barnie8×
Basil3×
Batman3×
Baxter Theatre1×
Beacon Hill High School2×
Bear4×
Beer2×
Beer Beer Beer1×
Beethoven’s Emperor Concerto1×
Beetle8×
Beetles4×
Beijing2×
Belgian2×
Belgian Wim Dinkelman1×
Belgians3×
Belgium4×
Belgium World Cup1×
Benson3×
Berber2×
Bernie4×
Betty's Bay1×
Bev2×
Bevis Marks1×
Bifstek2×
Bill Clinton2×
Bill Clinton's1×
Bill Clinton’s Monica1×
Billy Idol1×
Bin Laden2×
Biological Pore Perfect1×
BirdLife South Africa2×
Birdman Ralph1×
Birds2×
Black Beauty1×
Black Eagle Publishing1×
Blacks4×
Bles Bridges1×
Bobby Skinstad1×
Boeing2×
Bomb2×
Boney3×
Booysens3×
Borneo2×
Boston2×
Boston Philharmonic Orchestra1×
Boston University1×
Botswana's Makgadikgadi2×
Boulders3×
Boyes Drive1×
Bramley2×
Brandon2×
Brendan O’Thwatts-Tucker1×
Breyten7×
Brits6×
Bruwer4×
Buffalo Bulls1×
Buthelezi2×
Buy3×
Cairo2×
Caledon6×
Caledon Casino1×
California3×
Call12×
Camel2×
Canadians2×
Candy One3×
Candy Two3×
Candys3×
Cango Valley2×
Canine Compendium1×
Cape Flats2×
Cape Malay1×
Cape Talk1×
Cape Town International1×
Captain Faizel Kader1×
Cardigan Road2×
Casper3×
Cate Blanchett1×
CD-Rom2×
Central Business District1×
Central Statistical Service2×
Central Statistics1×
Cerf3×
Cerrig Cyplau1×
Chairman Mao1×
Charles Zwane1×
Charlie3×
Charlie Kark2×
Child2×
Child Welfare3×
Chopin3×
Chott2×
Chris Hani1×
Chris Hani Baragwanath Hospital1×
Chris Levin1×
Christi Lake1×
Christian3×
Christmas Box Day1×
Church Street3×
City Engineer’s Department1×
Civic Theatre2×
Claire2×
Clairol Footspa1×
Cleo15×
Click Song1×
Clinton3×
Club Med1×
Club Mediterranee2×
Coastal Birds1×
Coastal Birds Sanccob1×
Colour2×
Common Market Commissioner’s1×
Communist Manifesto1×
Community Safety Minister Hennie Bester1×
Comrades Marathon1×
Con7×
Con Bletsas1×
Congo2×
Conservation3×
Coon Carnival1×
Cora Lee2×
Corbett Greenspan1×
Cordoba Crescendo1×
Cornwall3×
Cosmic Mind Four-letter-word1×
Country2×
Crawfords2×
Crocodile River1×
Cuba5×
Cyclone Eline1×
Czechoslovakia3×
Czechs2×
Da Grayat Man2×
Da Vincidom2×
Dada3×
Damon Hill1×
Danie6×
Danie Lategan1×
Daniel Day Lewis1×
Darling9×
Dassen2×
Datsun Safari1×
Dave2×
Dave Pincus1×
David Falkow2×
David Issroff1×
David Platt1×
David Ryan1×
De Waal Drive1×
Dead3×
Delhi Palace1×
Demi Moore1×
Department8×
Deputy Minister1×
Deputy President2×
Des3×
Des Kloeck2×
Des Kloeck’s1×
Dewi Hughs1×
Diagonal Street1×
Dick2×
Die Gereformeerde Blues Band1×
Die Old1×
Dinkelman9×
Dirty2×
Discover Garden Birds1×
Disney World1×
Dog Animal Rescue Group Darg1×
Dolly3×
Dolly Partonblonde1×
Dolphins2×
Don Gregorio1×
Donald Trump1×
Douggie2×
Dougie4×
Dougie Bester1×
Douz2×
Dr Abu-Baker Asvat1×
Dr Albert Schweitzer1×
Dr Arnold Needham1×
Dr Asvat1×
Dr Daniel Oliphant1×
Dr Des McLeod1×
Dr Guy Preston1×
Dr Huggle1×
Dr Needham1×
Dr Oliphant2×
Dr Percy Huggle1×
Dr Preston1×
Dr Puller1×
Dr Ruth1×
Drakensberg3×
Drakensberg Express4×
Drama2×
Drug2×
Dublin Botanical Gardens1×
Ducks2×
Durban’s North Beach1×
Dutch East India Company1×
Duzi Canoe Marathon1×
Dvinsk3×
Early2×
East2×
East Coast1×
East London1×
Education3×
Education Sibusiso Bengu1×
Egypt2×
Egyptian Toffee1×
Egyptians3×
Elaine Simpson1×
Elana Meyers1×
Eleanor Lombard1×
Elia Kazan1×
Elizabeth3×
Eloff Street1×
Emma2×
Emmarentia2×
End3×
England’s John Barnes1×
English Amanda1×
Englishman Horace Thwatts-Tucker1×
Enid Blyton's1×
Environment2×
Environmental Affairs1×
Enzo Scifo1×
Erox2×
Errol Flynn1×
Ertjies2×
Esmarelda6×
Euan9×
Euan Crawford2×
Eugene Opperman1×
Europe4×
Europeans2×
Eva Vouyoucalos1×
Eve Horwitz1×
Everglades2×
Evita Bezuidenhout's1×
Excrementals Unlimited1×
Face3×
Fair3×
False Bay2×
Far2×
Father Christmasing1×
Favours3×
Fees3×
Ferrari2×
Fidel Castro1×
Fight Against Crime1×
First12×
First Class1×
Fishing2×
Flora Robson1×
Florence7×
Florence Mdaka2×
Florida2×
Forestry Minister Ronnie Kasrils1×
Fort Knox1×
Fortes King Group1×
Francina2×
Francina Dlamini1×
Francis Gagui1×
Francois Hardy1×
Frankenstein2×
Frau Putzi Wagenbauer1×
Free Society1×
Free State National Party1×
Freedom Front's1×
French School2×
Friedrich5×
Friendship Friday1×
Friendship Month2×
Frumilla Glibbeltorte1×
Für Elise1×
Garbo3×
Garth2×
Gary Player1×
Gary Teichman1×
Gary Teichmann1×
Gate3×
Gate Children's Home1×
Gatsha3×
Gauteng6×
Gauties2×
Gaye Davis1×
Gene Louw3×
Geoff Lockwood1×
George Fivaz1×
George Harrison1×
George Soros1×
George Stubbs1×
Gerkin2×
Germans3×
Germany8×
Germiston3×
Gershon Gerstelbaum4×
Gershon Gerstelbaum’s1×
Gershon Gerstelbaums1×
Gershwin5×
Gershwin Blaauw1×
Getaway Outdoor Adventure Show1×
Getting Antsy1×
Getting Started1×
Gilbert2×
Girl Guide1×
Gold Cross1×
Goldmans2×
Goodwill3×
Goodwill Sunday1×
Gorbachev2×
Gordon3×
Gordon Keyes1×
Gordone Kaaiyas1×
Government6×
Grade Ones1×
Graham McIntosh1×
Grahamstown4×
Gran2×
Grand Bazaar3×
Grandfather Tickle1×
Grandmother Whistler1×
Granny Dorcus Trevone1×
Granny Lee1×
Great Baghdad Belly Dancers Truce1×
Great Dane1×
Great Debate1×
Great Eastern Erg1×
Great Lakes1×
Great Orifice Debate1×
Great Wall2×
Greater Metropolitan1×
Grecian2×
Green4×
Green Masemola2×
Green Point1×
Greenmarket Square2×
Gregorio Fuerentes Betancourt1×
Greta Garbo1×
Groote Schuur1×
Groovy3×
Group Areas2×
Guinness Book1×
Gumpel Magoel1×
Guru Aldo1×
Gus5×
Guy4×
Guy Preston6×
Gwyneth Paltrow1×
Hamlet’s Ophelia1×
Hammamades Berber1×
Hampstead Heath1×
Hans Dorbrecht1×
Hansie Cronje2×
Happy Klissimus4×
Havana2×
Head2×
Heather7×
Heidi5×
Helen Joseph1×
Helen Joseph's1×
Helen Suzman1×
Helena Pirow’s1×
Helga2×
Hell3×
Hell’s Angel1×
Hello70×
Hello Carol1×
Hello Caroltjie1×
Hello Mrs Lazar1×
Hello Norman1×
Hello Ouma2×
Hello Oumas1×
Hello Ralph1×
Hello There Have1×
Help11×
Hemingway2×
Henri4×
Henry Crodd1×
Henry Jay1×
Henry Jay Gerkin3×
Herman Jansen1×
Herpes Ducks1×
Herschelle Gibbs1×
Hillary Clinton2×
Hilton2×
Himalayas2×
HIV-positive6×
Hogg MacBull4×
Holiday Inn1×
Hollywood2×
Hollywood's2×
Holy Grail1×
Home6×
Horrors2×
Horse2×
Horse Chestnut1×
Horwitzes4×
Hot Springs6×
Hotstuff5×
House2×
Hubert2×
Hubert Throgthwaite1×
Hugh Falkus1×
Hugo7×
Hugo’s2×
Humans2×
Humphrey Habbel2×
Hymie Cornbloom1×
Hypertext Markup Language1×
Ian McDonald5×
Imelda Marcos1×
Impostor Candy4×
In-between Metropolitan1×
Indaba4×
Indoor Speedway1×
Ingrid Schwarzburger1×
Inken Hainebach1×
International Congress1×
International Convention Centre1×
International Journal1×
Internet4×
Iraq2×
Irish4×
Irishman2×
Iron Man2×
Iron Woman1×
Isidor Davis1×
Istanbul3×
Italians2×
Jaco Kruger1×
Jacques Brel1×
Jacqui4×
Jacqui L'Ange1×
Jaime2×
James Hadley Chase1×
Jamie’d2×
Jan Ceulemans1×
Jani Allan1×
Jaques Brel1×
Jean Waite1×
Jed2×
Jeffry Lee1×
Jeremiah-the-builder2×
Jerry Richardson1×
Jessie3×
Jesus3×
Jet Bronzer2×
Jewish Shaka1×
Jews3×
Joan Brickhill1×
Jody6×
Joey Haarhof1×
Johannes Kerkorrel1×
Johannesburg Child Welfare Society1×
Johannesburgers4×
John Bishop2×
John Lennon1×
John Marsh1×
John Robbie1×
Johnny Meyer1×
Jomo Sono4×
Jonah2×
Joost3×
Joseph4×
JR's3×
Judge Edwin Cameron1×
Judy Reidy1×
Julian Champkin2×
Kadar Asmal1×
Kalahari2×
Kansas City1×
Kapenaars2×
Karlsruhe3×
Karoo7×
Keep7×
Ken Newman4×
Kenny2×
Kew Gardens1×
Khayelitsha5×
Kheto2×
Kheto Ncube2×
Killarney2×
Killer2×
King Arthur's Excalibur1×
Kiwis2×
Klein Karoo1×
Kleintjie Klonk1×
Kobus Wiese1×
Koos2×
Kork Ballington1×
Kos4×
Kosovo4×
Krog2×
Kruger National Park1×
Kruger Rand1×
Kubu Island1×
Kuils River1×
Kumquat5×
KwaZulu Natal1×
KwaZulu Natal Democratic Party1×
La Dawn1×
Ladies2×
Lady Anne Barnard's1×
Lady Macbeth1×
Lake Dal1×
Lancia Thema1×
Land2×
Land Acts1×
Land Affairs1×
Landrover3×
Last55×
Last Monday1×
Last Post1×
Last Sunday3×
Last Thursday5×
Last Tuesday2×
Last Wednesday1×
Le Frog2×
Le Rouxs1×
Learner2×
Lena2×
Lenasia2×
Leon Hong1×
Les10×
Les-Concierges4×
Lesser Metropolitan1×
Letta-Liza3×
Lettie Miya1×
Lewis3×
Liberty Life2×
Liberty Life’s1×
Life-time Achievement Oscar1×
Limpopo3×
Limpopo River1×
Linda Stone1×
Lindi2×
Lion King1×
Lions5×
Lisa Swerling1×
Little8×
Little Barry's1×
Little Carol1×
Little Friedrich1×
Little Rock1×
Livingston7×
Liza2×
Loda12×
Loftus2×
Lolo2×
Lolo Sono1×
Lombard2×
London Philharmonic1×
Lord7×
Lost Wheels Society2×
Louis Manuel2×
Louis Wolmarans1×
Louise Calmet1×
Louvre2×
Love5×
Lucas Radebe1×
Lufthansa's Senator1×
Luna Spoon2×
Madame Mary1×
Madikizela-Mandela2×
Madonnas2×
Magnus Heystek1×
Main Manne1×
Malcolm Meintjes1×
Malelane Gate1×
Mall2×
Mallett3×
Maltese Scotties1×
Malteses2×
Mandela United Football Club1×
Mangosuthu Buthelezi1×
Manuel5×
Manuela Gago-Dominguez1×
Margaret2×
Maria Callas1×
Marie Wessels1×
Marike2×
Mariner’s Wharf2×
Mario2×
Mario Lanza1×
Marion Crawford1×
Marmite2×
Marriage5×
Martin Johnson1×
Mary3×
Maseru2×
Matmata5×
Maureen Isaacson's1×
Mauritian2×
Max4×
Maximilian2×
Maya Angelou3×
Maya Angelou's1×
Mayor Johannes1×
McCarthy2×
McGuiresville3×
McIntosh3×
Medum3×
Mel Gibson1×
Mel Rom1×
Melanie3×
Merc2×
Merv2×
Miami4×
Miami Airport1×
Midmar2×
Midmar Dam1×
Midmar Mile4×
Millennium Dome1×
Miller2×
Milly2×
Milly Holtz1×
Mimi Coertse1×
Mind41×
Mining Magnates1×
Mining Managers1×
Minister Holomisa1×
Minister Mango Buthelezi1×
Mintsky’s Meats1×
Miss Corrie1×
Mister Hardware1×
Mitchell's Plain2×
Mongo5×
Mongos2×
Moral McIntosh1×
Moses2×
Mother Teresa1×
Mount Nelson3×
Mount Nelson Hotel1×
Mr Anosmia1×
Mr Askan Bobubaka1×
Mr Busch2×
Mr Canada1×
Mr Champkin1×
Mr Delivery1×
Mr Dinkelman’s1×
Mr Falkus2×
Mr Floor1×
Mr Gerkin1×
Mr Gunther Zumwinkel1×
Mr Habbel1×
Mr Helmut Turteltaub1×
Mr High-Tech1×
Mr Keyser1×
Mr Kloeck1×
Mr Loda Mphela1×
Mr Lucern’s1×
Mr Masemola3×
Mr Mason4×
Mr Maswangane's1×
Mr McMahon1×
Mr O'Brien2×
Mr Plod1×
Mr Qukela1×
Mr Robinson2×
Mr Robinson’s1×
Mr Stubbs8×
Mr Thwatts-Tucker’s1×
Mr Zumwinkel1×
Mrs Ball's1×
Mrs Canada2×
Mrs Dellow4×
Mrs Hall1×
Mrs Ordinary Housewife4×
Mrs Raath3×
Mrs Trinchero1×
Mrs Winsome Wendy Gerkin1×
Ms Pat1×
Ms Schwarzburger1×
Muhamed Ali1×
Muslim Judicial Council1×
Namibia2×
Naomi Campbell3×
Natal Pembrook-Hargreaves1×
Natal Spa1×
Nathier2×
Nathier One1×
Nathier Two1×
National Anthem1×
National Foundation1×
National Men's Day2×
National Parks Board1×
National Women's Day5×
Nativity Play2×
Neil Jenkins1×
Nelson2×
Nelson Livingstone Seagull1×
Nelspruit2×
Net-Active2×
Neville Passmore1×
New National Party1×
New Orleans3×
New Orleans Superdome1×
New Tate1×
New York Variety Arts Theatre1×
Newby8×
Newspaper House1×
Niagara Falls1×
Nicholas Steyn1×
Nick Mallett2×
Nick O'Brien1×
Nick Polykardopoulos1×
Nicodemus Sono1×
Niekerk4×
Nina Apfelbaum3×
Ninette2×
Nkosazana Zumas1×
Nkosi Sikelel1×
Noddy2×
Norbert5×
Nosiphino4×
Nuno Palmeira1×
Observatory3×
Official Language Number Two1×
Okavango Swamps1×
Old2×
Old Ed's1×
Old Ed’s Health1×
Old McDonald1×
Old Van1×
Olga Horowitz1×
Olympic6×
Olympic Games1×
Orange Grove1×
Orange River2×
Ordinary3×
Oregon2×
Orgasmic Ornithological Experience1×
Orient Express2×
Orkney Snork Nie1×
Orri2×
Oscar Academy Awards1×
Osh Kosh1×
Other Colour1×
Oupa3×
Outer Mongolia1×
Overberg2×
Overberger Country Hotel1×
Pablo Neruda1×
Pablo Neruda's1×
Pacific2×
Pallo Jordan2×
Palm Beach3×
Palmeiras2×
Paltrow2×
Parachute2×
Parents2×
Parktown Boys1×
Parktown Prawn Today1×
Parktown Prawns1×
Parkwood Primary School1×
Pashir2×
Pass3×
Passover2×
Patrick MacMahon2×
Paul Gascoigne1×
Paul Johnson1×
Paul Jones1×
Paul McCartney1×
Paul Roos4×
Paula2×
Pauline2×
Pauline Raphaely1×
Paulpietersburg4×
Pavarotti3×
Pay3×
Peninsula2×
Pennsylvania University1×
Percy6×
Percy Baneshik1×
Percy Montgomery3×
Percy's3×
Perrier2×
Perv2×
Peter Bacon1×
Peter Borchert1×
Peter Mokaba1×
Peter O’Toole1×
Peter Shilton1×
Peter Webber2×
Petrus6×
Petrus Klonk1×
Petrus Masonga1×
Petrus Masongas1×
Petulia Gribble2×
Pharaohs2×
Phenomenal Women1×
Philippi2×
Picasso2×
Pierre Cardin1×
Pieter Rossouw1×
Pink Panther1×
Play5×
Pletzellochenhausen2×
Pocket Oxford Dictionary1×
Politically Correct1×
Pope3×
Population Registration1×
Population Registration Acts1×
Porchov Spermoginiser3×
Port Alfred1×
Porter Harvey1×
Potchefstroom2×
Pow Wow5×
Powis Castle2×
President Mandela1×
President Mandela's1×
President Slobodan Milosevic's1×
President Thabitha Mbeki2×
President Thabo Mbeki1×
Preston3×
Prince Albert1×
Prince’s Passion1×
Prince’s Passion Slays PM’s Daughter1×
Princess2×
Princess Di4×
Professional2×
Professor Behan2×
Professor Colin Harvey1×
Professor Flip Strydom1×
Professor Peter Behan1×
Professor Quintus Desiderium1×
Professor Strydom1×
Queen Elizabeth1×
Queen Victoria2×
Racquet Club1×
Rainbow Land1×
Ralph Poswell1×
Rambo6×
Rambo Carol1×
Rand Club1×
Randall2×
Randse Afrikaanse Universiteit1×
Razi Mustapha1×
Rea Borcherds1×
Reader's Digest Mapfinder1×
Rebecca Winchester McGherkin1×
Receiver2×
Reconciliation Commission3×
Red Army1×
Red Cross Children's Hospital1×
Red Cross Hospital1×
Remarkable Trees1×
Renata3×
Renata Ismail2×
Renata's3×
Responsible Weed Control1×
Revolutionary Association1×
Rhodes Johannes1×
Richard Branson1×
Rick2×
Ringo Starr1×
Rising Sun1×
Riviere Nature Reserve1×
Robben3×
Robberg2×
Robert Ludlum1×
Roberto Benigni1×
Robin McKie1×
Roderick6×
Roeland Street1×
Rolex2×
Rolling Stone1×
Rolls Royces1×
Roly2×
Rom2×
Romeo2×
Ronnie Kasrils2×
Roof2×
Rosh Hashanah1×
Rottsatians2×
Rottweiler3×
Round5×
Round Robin1×
Rover2×
Royal Cornwall Show1×
Rubicon2×
Russia5×
Rwanda4×
Sahara5×
Salt River1×
Salvador Dali1×
Sam Makoenas1×
Sam Mokoena1×
Sammy Davis Jr1×
Sammy Piek1×
San Diego1×
San Francisco1×
Sandton Sun1×
Saturdays2×
Save-Water2×
Schuurweberg2×
Scotland2×
Season3×
Sebastian Coe1×
Senator3×
Sergei Smzenko1×
Sexy Seniors1×
Sharks2×
Shaun Charlies5×
Sheik Jasmak1×
Shiite Muslim1×
Shirley8×
Shirley Conran1×
Shorter Oxford Dictionary1×
Siberian Steppes3×
Sibongile Khumalo1×
Sibusisi Tshabalala1×
Sierra Leone1×
Silver Streak1×
Silver Stream1×
Sipho6×
Siposethu3×
Sister Superior1×
Sizwe Sithole1×
Skull2×
Smile Saturday1×
Snake Park1×
Snoopy T-shirt1×
Snoring2×
Soldier Dorbrecht1×
Soldier Dorbrecht's2×
Soldier Hans1×
Solly5×
Solly Nzuza1×
Sonja Laxtons1×
Sophie Letsoalo1×
South Africa’s Minister1×
South African Malteses1×
South African National Swimming Championships1×
South African Ornithological Society1×
South African Tourism Board1×
South African Trade Unions Cosatu1×
South African Weed Science Society1×
South America1×
Southern African Foundation1×
Southern African Weed Science Society1×
Spa4×
Spain3×
Spar2×
Spar Ladies1×
Speedy Stubby2×
Spice Girls1×
Sri Lanka1×
St Francis1×
St George's Mall1×
St Thomas1×
Standard2×
Standard Encyclopaedia1×
Stanford4×
Star4×
Star's Travel Editor1×
State Lottery1×
State Presidency1×
Stellenbosch Boys High School1×
Stevenson Rocket1×
Steyn13×
Stompie Seipei1×
Stonehenge3×
Streetwise4×
Sullivan2×
Sumo2×
Sunny2×
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